Free The Amish Christmas Kitchen by Kelly Long

he asked.
    â€œDaniel, I can’t do this. It’s not fair to you. I—our first kiss will have to be our last. I’m sorry. . . .” She turned and skated quickly from his grasp before she could change her mind, then gained the bank on the far side of the field. She stumbled into the snow, and Sarah caught her arm.
    â€œClara, what is it? Why are you crying?”
    â€œCrying? I’m not.” But then she reached to feel the tears that were quickly changing to ice on her cheeks. “I—Sarah, can we just geh inside? I’m rather tired.”
    â€œOf course,” Sarah said in a bewildered tone.
    All Clara wanted was to get away from the ice and the haunting emerald eyes that she knew followed her through the firelit nacht .

C HAPTER 11
    D aniel was too deeply asleep, worn out with grief over Clara’s words, to try to wake from the dream he was having.
    An angel with wings like ice stood near his bed, speaking to him. I’m crazy like Da, he heard himself say and the angel laughed, a crystalline sound that penetrated his soul and reverberated like the strike of an ax against a tree.
    â€œNo, you’re not crazy . . . merely in love. Deeply in love.”
    â€œWhat can I do?” he cried out. “She won’t have me.”
    â€œShe won’t have herself—the truth of herself and what she really feels. You can’t give up. You cannot. . . .” The icy wings pulsed with rainbow-like colors and Daniel turned in his sleep, breaking the dream.
    * * *
    Clara settled between the comfortable pile of quilts and crisp sheets with a faint sigh. It was long after midnight, and she and Sarah had put the last touches on restoring the kitchen to order while Edward had gotten the kinner ready for bed.
    â€œOooh, this is like auld times, isn’t it?” Sarah yawned from her place in the big bed.
    â€œ Jah, ” Clara said quietly, unable to truly think of much more than the shine of Daniel’s eyes.
    â€œWhat happened with you and Daniel tonight on the ice?”
    â€œNothing, really. I told him that I wasn’t interested in—well, pursuing a relationship.”
    Sarah gave a delicate groan of frustration. “But, Clara, why?”
    Because of Seth and because I’m scared and because . . .
    â€œBecause what if there’s another tree?”
    â€œAnother tree?” Sarah asked, puzzled.
    â€œLike the one that killed Seth. Another tree or an illness or an accident, then what?”
    â€œClara.” Her sister’s voice was gentle. “You can’t live and be afraid constantly. Loving someone is always a risk, and there’s the potential for pain, yes. But love is worth it.”
    â€œI—I don’t know that.”
    Sarah cuddled closer to give her a hug. “But you will, sweet sister. You will.”
    * * *
    â€œ Gott says, ‘Behold, I make all things new.’ ”
    Daniel tried to focus as Bishop Umble expounded upon the message the following morning. In truth, though, it was difficult to do anything more than think of Clara, who was sitting with the other widows somewhere behind him.
    Bishop Umble’s voice carried across the expanse of the Troyers’ snug barn and Daniel felt himself caught by the wise auld man’s words.
    â€œHow does Gott make something new out of something old? Or unwanted? Or unloved?”
    Unbidden, Daniel found himself having to blink back tears. How I wish I could take back that hasty proposal of two years ago and spend the time wooing her . . . . Why didn’t I think? But maybe, Gott can even make that time new again. . . . Give me a second chance. . . .
    â€œ Gott is the Gott of second chances,” Bishop Umble said. “He takes what we think is a mess in our lives and cleans it up—makes it new. Remember that today.”
    Daniel closed his eyes and prayed, longing for the truth of Gott ’s newness in both his and Clara’s lives.
    * *