Free Returning Home by Karen Whiddon

fingers trembling.
    The next page had been devoted to the Homecom ing Dance. In the center of the page was a photograph of the King and Queen, arms around each other, beaming into the camera.
    He and Hope.
    Hope made a sound, a small gasp. Immediately, Charlene patted her shoulder. Clay squirmed in his seat, looking away.
    Jeff grabbed the book away from Hope, holding it closer to study it. The photograph showed him beam ing proudly down at the petite girl under his arm. She’d worn her black hair up, her shimmery gown hugging her sleek curves. The emotions she’d felt at that moment showed clearly in her lovely face: pride mixed with love, delight, and sheer joy. In the next instant, the instant after the photographer had snapped the picture, once the flash had blinded them, she’d laughed and hugged him. Somehow, he remembered that.
    She’d worn a form-fitting dress of deep, mysterious green.
    “You were beautiful,” he told Hope slowly, his gaze lingering on her downcast head. Her hair, still as black, still as shiny, barely touched her shoulders now. Back then it had hung nearly to her waist
    “Thank you.” Her chin came up. Clear and guile less, her amber eyes hinted at a deep, deep sorrow.
    For him? He felt an instant’s confusion. He didn’t
    need to understand, after all, she’d been the one who ...
    He drew a blank. She’d been the one who .. . what? Like smoke, the thought vanished.
    Clay and Charlene watched him with unabashed curiosity.
    “Did you remember something?” His sister’s voice sounded overly bright and eager.
    After a moment, Jeff shook his head. The tiny flashback of memory he’d experienced seemed hardly worth mentioning.
    “Man, I’m sorry.” Clay stretched a bit and got up. “You look like you’ve had enough for one day. I think it’s time I head home.”
    Charlene stood, too. “Before you do, come into the kitchen. I need to talk to you and this munchkin here.” She gave Derek a loud kiss.
    Jeff started to stand. Hope waved him back down. “Sit, please. I’d like to finish looking at the year book.”
    With a start, he realized he was still holding the damn thing. “I don’t—”
    “Come on,” Hope gave him a wan smile. “We haven’t finished our trip down memory lane.”
    Was that sarcasm he heard in her voice?
    Why?
    Reluctantly , he sat down beside her, his weight on the cushions causing her hip to brush against his. Muttering an apology, he handed her the book.
    They looked at more pictures, some occasionally bringing a smile to her pale face. Watching her, Jeff found himself wishing she would smile more often.
    She pointed out people, naming names and telling Jeff about their personalities, nicknames, and habits. Though Jeff knew he should remember, he didn’t.
    “So,” Hope asked finally, closing the book, “did anything, anything at all, jog your memory?”
    He noticed she’d stopped a few pages short of the end. Curious, he flicked back the cover, thumbing through the pages until he reached the page that she’d forgotten—or avoided.
    “Graduation,” he breathed, staring at a picture of himself, much younger, twirling around an oddly sullen Hope, still in their caps and gowns.
    Images exploded in his mind. He heard angry words. He felt accusations. He sensed hurt and rage at a time when life should have been just beginning. The scenes came, fragmented, lightning fast, too quick for him to assimilate and analyze.
    He stood still and let them wash over him.
    Hope’s tears. He’d done ... he’d done .... It was there, just barely out of reach.
    Clenching his fists, he closed his eyes and let his mind try.
    Graduation. Pride. Empty, hollow, foolish pride.
    And pain.
    Then nothing.
    Chapter Six
    Furious with himself, Jeff kept his body rigid and tried to think. Tried to remember.
    Nothing.
    He wanted to pound his fists into the wall in frustration.
    “Jeff?” Tentative, Hope’s voice reached him through his fog. “What is it? Are you all