Free SOMEONE DIFFERENT by Kate Hanney Page A

after a slight hesitation, lifted up his hand. His thumb glanced over my cheek, and his fingers pressed lightly under my chin. Finally , he moved a little closer, stopped for just a second, then leaned right in, closed his eyes, and kissed me.
    Jeez, it made me tingle all over. All I could do at first was lay there, loving how his lips moved slowly over mine, how his hand held the back of my neck, keeping my head steady. But then my lips parted, and I started to kiss him back; really kiss him back. My arms folded around his shoulders, my fingers touched his hair. Even though his weight pushed down on me, it still felt gentle, safe; reassuring. And, God, I never wanted it to stop.
    But of course it had to – eventually.
    Jay raised his eyebrows, then grinned at me. ‘About only bein’ able to see ya on Thursdays,’ he said. ‘Is there some way we can get round that?’
    I giggled, and we kissed again, and then again.
    But that’s all we did do. Jay’s hands stayed firmly on the outside of the hoodie, and he never touched me anywhere that might’ve made me feel uncomfortable. He put no pressure on whatsoever.
    The truth was though, if he had, I think I’d have done it. It wasn’t why I’d gone there, and there were a hundred reasons why it was a bad idea. But in one night, I’d lost Pepper, ran away, found Jay, and ended up in bed with him. Everything was mixed-up, my head was all over the place. And, although I still didn’t feel quite brave enough to make the first move, if he had, I’m sure I wouldn’t have stopped him.
    But he didn’t. And actually, about an hour later, it was Jay who sat up and said, ‘It’s getting late. D’ya think you ought to be makin’ a move?’
    I sighed. ‘I know, I will. But not yet; please, can I just stay a tiny bit longer?’
    He lay down again. ‘Stay as long as ya want for me, darlin’.’ He cuddled me, and I closed my eyes tightly.
    Last year, when we were on holiday in Italy, I went in this huge, transparent, plastic bubble thing. You got in through a slit, then they inflated it with air and Velcroed you in. They attached it to a long rope and launched you into the sea, where you bobbled, and spun and fell around everywhere. It was fantastic. And lying there, in Jay’s arms, reminded me of it. I could still see out, I knew everything on the outside still existed, but it couldn’t touch me. While ever he was holding me, I could float along in that bubble, and I was protected – from everyone, and everything.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    15 – Jay
     
    I let her sleep ’til about twelve. She looked like proper peaceful laid there. Her eyes were less red than before, and when I lifted her arm up to look at the time on her Gucci watch, it felt all floppy and relaxed.
    It hit me how much the bones in her wrist stuck out though, and the watch fitted that loosely, I’m surprised it never slipped off over her hand. Her fingers were slim as well, and although they were mostly all white and soft, the skin round both her thumbnails was red-raw. You could see where she’d picked away at it until it’d bled. Why would she do that to herself?
    Her hand twitched a bit in mine, then it went still again. I smiled; Billy’d piss himself when I told him she’d turned up at our house, spent hours in bed with me, and all that’d happened was she’d fallen asleep. That , had never happened before.
    But ... I don’t know; it was just cos she was so upset and quiet, and she’d had a rough time. It sort of made me feel like I ought to look after her, you know? Rather than just get straight on with it. When she kissed me, you could tell she proper meant it, and even though she’d been a total wreck when she’d first walked in, she’d chilled out pretty quickly – she’d have done it, I think, if I’d have pushed her.
    But it didn’t feel like I should. I know it sounds stupid, but she was pretty messed-up . It would’ve sort have been too easy, like if she