Free The Naughty List by L.A. Kelley Page A

their inbred sensitivity to the objects are chosen as guardians. That brings me to why I’m here. One of the objects disappeared. I tracked The Book to Penrose’s.”
    Rosalie gave him the eye. “I don’t know where you get your intel, but I assure you we don’t stock magical relics, not even special order.”
    David’s banter vanished. Through a crack in the E.L.F.’s friendly façade, Rosalie glimpsed something hidden underneath. Concern? No…fear. Unconsciously, she shivered. What rattles a mystical being with the ability to teleport away at the first sign of trouble? Now would be a good time to wake up from this dream. But you don’t believe this is a dream or a hallucination anymore, do you?
    Desperation crept into his voice. “The Book is in Penrose’s. I know it. I feel it. I just can’t find it.”
    “Why come to me?”
    “You know the store.” He dropped his gaze. “I hadn’t planned to reveal myself to anyone at Penrose’s. Integrals keep their existence on the down low for security reasons, but…” He fumbled with the words, his face growing red. “You got into trouble because of the candy and the notes. I decided before asking for help, I owed you an apology.”
    “I thought you were a Sneaky Shopper,” Rosalie blurted out and then chuckled in embarrassment. “You have the right skill set.”
    Some of the weariness left the E.L.F.’s face. “I guess I do, but the Sneaky Shopper was the lady with the red eyeglass frames. I followed her when she tailed you and heard her call your boss. I thought maybe if I explained everything…” He reached out and grasped her hand. “Please, Rosalie, I need someone who knows all the ins and outs of Penrose’s. If The Book gets into the wrong hands…”
    He looked so lost. Rosalie’s skin warmed under his touch. She cleared her throat. “Why did you leave the notes?”
    He lookalign="justify">“I…well…I wanted to see you smile.” He dropped her hand and flushed. “People haven’t done much smiling lately since The Book disappeared.”
    Rosalie eyed him askance. “All this over a book?”
    “Not just a book. The Book. The most magical, powerful book of all, one of the oldest mystical relics. My family is the official keeper. The duty was passed down for dozens of generations and became mine when I turned twenty-one. The Book is a codex tapping into each individual’s unique spiritual essence. Grievances and moral choices are weighed and measured. The result is the separation of humans and Integrals into two lists with the propensity for virtue on one side verses baser characteristics on the other that detour an individual from a righteous path.”
    Rosalie wrinkled her brow, straining to understand. “Okay, a book with two lists. On one side are nice people, and on the other…” Her eyes widened. Oh, no. It couldn’t be. He couldn’t possibly mean… She shot him a piercing gaze. He looked away and studied an empty take-out carton. Oh, cripes. “The Book is the Naughty and Nice List!” She sunk back into her seat, stunned. “Are you telling me I’m sitting across the table from one of Santa’s Elves?” Where is the nice nurse with those meds?
    David cleared this throat. “I never exactly said I wasn’t. He’s the Santa, by the way, an honorary title, given to the head of clan E.L.F. Chief of Norse deities is called the Odin, head of Middle Eastern Demons is the Baal, that sort of thing. Dad’s real name is Brian.”
    “Dad? He’s your father?”
    “Well, yeah. I told you, The Book is a family thing. Dad is a direct descendant of a Norse forest deity. You’d like him. Helluva nice guy, nothing ever fazes him.”
    She raised an eyebrow. “He’s jolly.”
    “All right, fine,” David added with an eye roll. “He’s jolly, but not fat. He works hard to keep off the middle-age spread. He and Mom go to the gym.”
    “There’s a Mrs. Claus, too?”
    “Of course,” he sputtered. “I didn’t spontaneously generate from