Free Dear Blue Sky by Mary Sullivan

because I am afraid of being alone. Of this world. What if my family is killed and I am left like that new baby in Mama’s hospital. I can not think like that. We pray everyday and believe God keeps us safe.
    My life is a movie. The title is “Shock and Awe!” I wish to press rewind.
    Blue Sky
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    Blue Sky’s Blog
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    November 4, 2006
    On the way to the fruit and vegetable stand down the road I think I don’t know this Baghdad. The streets are littered with plastic bags, rice, eggshells, sandals, shirts, soda cans, newspapers. Wild dogs runs through the street. Buildings are black, wires hang down, glass piled in front of ruined stores. I have to remember my dream to live.
    Before I want to be a pharmacist but now I want to make Baghdad what it was. Maybe I become an architect. I tell myself to live strong.
    We see Mama’s hairdresser there. She say the lemons are good today so Mama examine them.
    Did you heard? R. say quiet to Mama. It is against the law for the tomatoes to lie next to the cucumbers.
    Mama laugh then cover her mouth and looked at Abu M. sit beside his stack of newspapers. All be careful. You never know who listens. They talk about another family they know moving to Jordan.
    Blue Sky
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    Blue Sky’s Blog
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    November 2, 2006
    My cousin M. encourage me to start blog. He do to. He say to write what happens to me every day. I am nervous to write. I want everyone to no Iraq, old beautiful Iraq before the war. Everyone live with fear from that day almost three years past. For the war to end is best. We pray for this.
    I go to school and not more because it is danger for us. Bombs go off in the streets and markets. Snipers hide in neighborhoods. So many leave our country. Professors and doctors.
    You can view my profile. I like many kinds music and reading and swimming (no more swimming now). I hopes you like my blog and email me.
    Regards,
    Blue Sky
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    Sef wasn’t in charge of the bombs, tanks, and home invasions. He was helping. Fixing things. That’s what he did, I told myself.
    I looked up
hijab
. It was a headscarf. This was how Blue Sky lived. She was only a year older than I was. I thought of what Mr. G said:
What a waste.
This war was a waste, that’s what he was talking about. Most kids in my school didn’t even care that there was a war. The truth was that I didn’t either until Sef went there. Reading Blue Sky’s blogs made me more confused.
I didn’t know anything about anything
.

CHAPTER 12
    RECEIVER OF MEMORIES
    THE FLAG IN Van’s window fluttered as she walked by. She was standing behind me. “What’re you doing?”
    â€œYou’re home already?” I looked up. “I’m reading a blog by a girl from Iraq.”
    Van dropped her backpack to the floor and fell back on her bed. “Why?” she asked.
    â€œWhy what?”
    â€œWhy are you reading her blog?”
    â€œI feel like it,” I said.
    â€œWell, hurry up.” She rolled over on her bed. “I need the computer.”
    â€œI just have to send a quick email.”
    She opened her French book and rested her head on it like a pillow. I could feel her eyes on me now. “Is it because you miss Sef?” she asked.
    â€œWhat?”
    â€œThat you’re reading that blog.”
    â€œI guess so,” I said. “Don’t you miss him?”
    â€œOf course I miss him. Just because I don’t say anything doesn’t mean I don’t miss him. I think about him all the time.”
    â€œHe called today.”
    â€œI know. Mrs. Adams called, too. What’d you do to Ben?”
    I shrugged. “I didn’t hurt him. I put him in a Jack. What’d Mom say?”
    â€œShe said she hoped Ben’s arms felt better and that you’d be over to apologize later.”
    I groaned.
    â€œYou should have Jacked Kristen too,” Van said.
    â€œFor the other