knew that all I had experienced as a child was reality. Regardless of what the doctors and the psychiatrist told, I knew I was not under hallucination.
My dad was one of the greatest researchers in his times. He had served his part at NASA, but he was ousted from office when it was found that he has tried to establish a link with the outer space even though it wasn’t defined in the research.
There was some huge amount of data which was downloaded from his machine and it was set to an unknown signal. This was considered as one of the biggest security breach and an organization like NASA could never let it go.
Dad had tried to explain a lot of times that he didn’t send the data. He had just received an incoming wave from outer space and as he tried to establish contact because it could have been the biggest scientific breakthrough, he found that there was a massive data loss.
Ever since he had lost his job, he started working in his own room in our house and that was kind of the last time when I interacted with dad. I was just four years old that time, but my dad stopped playing with me.
I was no longer the daughter he couldn’t stop talking about and he spent all his time on his own machine. He became secluded and even though he was alive and with us, our family started feeling dead. Back then, I was too little to understand. Mom always told me, daddy is busy and I grew up with the notion that daddy was always busy.
I still remember how we lost him. It was one of those Friday evenings where I and mom used to bake. Mom made the best doughnut ever and I always devoured them like a lioness. She had decided to bake a few cupcakes too for me and was teaching me how to do it when we saw dad leaving the home.
“Hey, Alan, where are you headed?” mom said as this was after a really long time that dad was leaving his place.
He said nothing and simply closed the door and went out. Mom had tried repeatedly to go into his room a lot of times before and had used every possible method by which she could make him speak, but, it felt like he just didn’t recognize any of us.
That was the last time we saw dad. He never returned and we never knew what happened to him. Mom had been inconsolable for a few days. We filed a report with the local police and it was after a painful fortnight that they told us that his clothing with all his belonging was spotted at the edge of a lake. The final report was that he had drowned himself, but we both knew that dad wouldn’t commit suicide.
He was walking on one of his projects and when we came back to his room, I was fascinated by all those machines.
I was just nine and yet those machines truly fascinated me. I was excited to see them and I still hadn’t fully registered the fact that dad was gone.
Mom too felt like someone took away a huge part of her. She still tried her best and she wanted to give me the best of the world. I saw her working hard. She started picking more jobs and I knew that she was going through a hard phase, but in the end, I remained oblivious to everything. I wanted to just be lost in the beautiful world of stars and planets and galaxies.
Mom was scared that I too would be trapped in the other world and would never be able to be myself again. This is why she often got paranoid and tried too hard to excavate me out of the mess. At that time, I didn’t realize what the big fuss was and I couldn’t understand why mom was so paranoid.
But, as I grew up and lost mom, I could feel the void eat into my heart. I knew that I missed something huge and no matter, how hard I tried, things didn’t feel alright.
Not only did I lose my mom, but I also lost a huge part of my existence. I could feel the loss in my very own bones. Every night when I headed to bed I used to stare at the ceiling and I could feel the stars.
The voice from outer space had begun to ebb away and I wanted nothing more than to hear those little voices. I wanted to feel the presence of that alien in