Free Kimber by Sarah Denier

“I know who
you are and I won’t apologize for carin’ about you. You’ve been lyin’ to us, we
had a right to worry.” 
    “ OhmyGod !”
I yell lacing my hands behind my head before dropping them back down to my
side. “You’re not even trying to understand! Just get out, both of you, leave.”
    “Kimber!”
Luke starts to protest.
     “No!
I don’t want to do this. I can’t do this. You and me, it was a mistake.”
    The
words cling to my throat, nearly choking me as they come out. In retrospect, it
isn’t Luke I really wanted to let go of. It’s the perception of the person they
see me becoming. No sooner have I turned my back to Luke does he slam his hand
against the island counter top.  The noise startles me. I turn back around just
as Luke takes me by the arms. His eyes search mine, looking for my reason.
    “Tell
me what you want? You want to hear that I’m sorry, ‘cause I am. I screwed
everything up. Amber and I might care too much but at least we give a shit. Yet
you’ll bleed and lie to hear the name of someone who doesn’t give a shit about
you. I’ll be damned if  you shut me out because of this.”
     It’s
something in his conviction, something in the way he speaks of Leo and slight
sly way his lip curls. Oh my God, he’s jealous. “I can’t believe I didn’t see
this. All this is about for you is Leo.”
    For
a split second his face betrays him and I see the truth. It’s like a two-way
mirror. Now I know what is on the other side. The changes in their
personalities, the realization that I don’t really know the people I thought I
knew, make my stomach turn and my heart sink.
    The
truth revealed, Luke releases me and storms out the back door. I hadn’t
realized how tight his grip actually was. I’m certain I will have bruises by
dinner time.
     “Are
you ok?” I nod to Amber.
    “I
think you should go.”
    “I’m
sorry for what you view as wrong. I love you Kimber, I’d die before I’d ever
hurt you. You know that. The doctor asked questions and maybe we said too much
but we’re concerned. The doctor said that everythin’ goin’ on was probably your
way of crying out for help. I can’t describe how awful that made me feel. Some
best friend I am. I should have been there for you more; instead I just let you
down.” Amber wipes a tear from her cheek.
    The
X chromosome is Mother Nature’s secret weapon. It makes us girls prone to an
involuntary reaction. This reaction is triggered by, but not limited to,
puppies, boy bands, romantic comedies, flowers, and the wrong kind of boys with
type A personalities. Any of these things have one of two automatic responses.
Complete loss of reality or Niagara Falls type crying.
    Looking
at my best friend, seeing her broken and holding unwarranted guilt, makes me
cry before I even know it. I can count on one hand the number of fights Amber
and I have had. We are the mirrored opposite of each other, but inside she’s my
soul sister. Even though I can’t say I would have done the same, I can say that
when it comes to me, her intentions were genuine. With tears now rolling down
both our faces, I throw my arms around her and squeeze tight.
    “I’m
so sorry Kimber.” She sobs.
    “Shhh.
I know you’d stop at nothing for me. I will always come to you, like I always
have, whenever I have a problem. I promise. You’ll never let me down.”
     “Still
besties?”
    I
hold her at arms length, “‘Til the end of time.”
                 Having
cried out our differences, Amber and I make amends. We put our fight behind us
and schedule a much needed night of good old fashion girl bonding. As Amber
leaves, she asks one thing of me. “Give Luke a break. He really cares about
you.”
    I
have no idea how to face Luke. The score between us is even. I wish I knew why
he felt threatened by Leo’s name. Why he wouldn’t want me to know it. What worries
me more is the growing way Leo’s name attaches itself to me. The way my