again. “So like I said, I didn’t just stumble into this line of work. Ben and George made a vow to my parents. If anything happened to them, they’d watch out for me.”
She looked up and the floor just about fell out from under Derek. Tears pooled at the edge of her eyelids. Raw emotion ripped across her face as a sad smile that never made it to her eyes tugged at her lips. “Just after my eighteen birthday, something did.”
Her bottom lip trembled and she looked down. Without hesitating, Derek moved next to her. When she didn’t move, he reached down and rested his hand on top of hers. “Hey. Sorry for pushing. You don’t—”
“No, no. It’s fine.” She withdrew her hand and wiped her face. “Wow. Sorry. It’s been over ten years. I thought I’d locked that away.”
“Hey.” Derek tipped her chin up. “You never get over it, Lil. It’s what keeps us human.”
Lily’s bottom lip trembled and she caught it in between her teeth, looking away. Derek recognized her need to shut down the emotions. It was the only way to stay sane. He would know—he’d done it himself more times than he’d care to admit. He moved back, giving her space.
She took a deep breath. “The official report is that they lost control of their car while on the autobahn in Germany, which we both know is a load of crap. No matter how much digging I do, I can’t unlock the classified file, but I know it was a mission that went south. Ben and George, well, they kept their word, even though I was technically an adult by then, and they’ve watched out for me ever since.”
“As a doorman and a coffee-shop owner?”
“Ben once told me coffee beans smelled better than blood.” She raised her eyes to Derek’s. Golden flecks danced within a sea of green and brown. A sad smile pulled at her lips. “How can you argue that?”
He reached out and gently stroked her cheek, wiping away a tear. “You can’t.”
And he couldn’t. Combat was shit. Necessary, but shit nonetheless, and the aftermath of it was lasting. Derek would never change the path he’d walked, but it took a long time—if ever—to get the smell of blood out of his nostrils.
It never escaped his mind.
She stared at him for what felt like an eternity, searching. For what, Derek didn’t know. But as far as he was concerned, she could search for as long as she wanted—he had nothing to hide.
Well
...Derek swallowed hard.
Her lips curved slightly as a small, sad laugh escaped. “No, you can’t. So you smile and support it, especially after they’ve given up so much to support you.”
“But how did you get here?” Derek gestured to the open space. They could have plucked her penthouse loft straight from a designer magazine. It was spectacular, with its dark espresso hardwood, floor-to-ceiling white sheers draping the windows of walls and the black baby grand piano sitting in the corner.
The gourmet kitchen opened up to the main living area and the granite that made up the kitchen island, with its deep veins of gray and specks of blue, looked as though it had been flown in from Italy. Instead of the typical backsplash, old exposed brick covered most of the kitchen wall, only adding to the “industrial meets glamour” look Lily’s place boasted. The various apartments of fellow agents he’d seen—including his own—had nothing on this place. It was huge and perfectly designed.
“This place...” she motioned around her “...has been our family’s safe house for as long as I can remember.”
“Remarkable.”
He was sure the things he couldn’t see far outweighed the things he could. He scanned the walls and the room, looking for anything he could use as a tell—a painting hung too far from the wall, a misplaced seam, a piece of the wooden floor that gave too much—to pinpoint where she kept her gear, because he knew she had it. Somewhere.
He got nothing.
Impressive.
“Okay. Better question. How have you managed the prolonged flight under