Free Adore by Doris Lessing

little girl – Alice. A big wave had leaped up and . . . ‘It’s bitten me,’ she shrieked. ‘The sea’s bitten me.’ Up jumped Ian, reached Shirley who also was making a commotion now. ‘Can’t you see,’ he shouted at Hannah, over the sea noise, ‘you’re frightening her? They’re frightened.’ With a tiny child on either shoulder he limped up out of the waves. He began a jiggling and joggling of the little girls in a kind of dance, but he was dipping in each step with the limp and they began to cry harder. ‘Granny,’ wailed Hannah, ‘I want my granny,’ sobbed Shirley. The infants were deposited on the rugs, Lil joined Roz, and the grandmothers soothed and petted the children while the other four went off to swim.
    â€˜There, my ducky,’ sang Roz, to Hannah.
    â€˜Poor little pet,’ crooned Lil to Shirley.
    Not long after this the two young women were in their new office, in the suite which would be the scene of their – they were convinced – future triumphs. ‘We are having a little celebration,’ they had said, making it sound as if there would be associates, sponsors, friends. But they were alone, drinking champagne and already tiddly.
    It was the end of their first year. They had worked hard, harder than they had expected. Things had gone so well there was already talk of expanding. That would meaneven longer hours, and more work for the grandmothers.
    â€˜They wouldn’t mind,’ said Hannah.
    â€˜I think they would,’ said Mary.
    There was something in her voice, and Hannah looked to see what Mary was wanting her to understand. Then, she said, ‘It’s not a question of us working our butts off – and their working their butts off – they want us to get pregnant again.’
    â€˜Exactly,’ said Mary.
    â€˜I wouldn’t mind,’ said Hannah. ‘I told Ian, yes, but there’s no hurry. We can get our business established and then let’s see. But you’re right, that’s what they want.’
    â€˜They,’ said Mary. ‘ They want. And what they want they intend to have.’
    Here Hannah showed signs of unrest. Compliant by nature, biddable, she had begun by deferring to Mary, such a strong character, but now she was asserting herself. ‘I think they are very kind.’
    â€˜They,’ said Mary. ‘Who the hell are they to be kind to us ?’
    â€˜Oh, come on! We wouldn’t have been able to start this business at all without the grandmothers helping with everything.’
    â€˜Roz is so damned tactful all the time,’ said Mary, and it exploded out of her, the champagne aiding and abetting. She poured some more. ‘They’re both so tactful.’
    â€˜You must be short of something to complain about.’
    â€˜I feel they are watching us all the time to make sure wecome up to the mark.’
    â€˜What mark?’
    â€˜I don’t know,’ said Mary, tears imminent. ‘I wish I knew. There’s something there .’
    â€˜They don’t want to be interfering mothers-in-law.’
    â€˜Sometimes I hate them.’
    â€˜ Hate ,’ Hannah dismissed, with a smile.
    â€˜They’ve got them, don’t you see? Sometimes I feel . . .’
    â€˜It’s because they didn’t have fathers – the boys. Ian’s father died and Tom’s went off and married someone else. That’s why the four of them are so close.’
    â€˜I don’t care why. Sometimes I feel like a spare part.’
    â€˜I think you’re being unfair.’
    â€˜Tom wouldn’t care who he was married to. It could be a seagull or a . . . or a . . . wombat.’
    Hannah flung herself back in her chair, laughing.
    â€˜I mean it. Oh, he’s ever so damned kind. He’s so nice. I shout at him and I pick a fight, anything just to make him – see me. And then the next