Free The Bastard by Jane Toombs

so far away she could hardly hear her. In the smoky darkness she couldn't see, there was only Rosa 's voice to guide her. She groped toward the voice, trying to hurry but she could barely drag herself along because of the heavy load she carried, a load she couldn't put down, no matter how hard she tried.

 
    Afraid she'd lose Rosa, she tried to call, " Rosa , wait!" but she couldn't speak. She had to rest, her back was about to break from the load, yet she didn't dare stop. Her feet hurt, she hurt all over but she had to go on. If she lost Rosa there was no hope for her, none at all.
     
     
     
     
     
    Chapter Five
     
     
     
    Was it a dream or did she really feel the wind in her face? Concepcion , hovering between waking and sleeping, struggled to understand. A sharp bang jerked her awake and she opened her eyes. She looked around in bewilderment, coughing. The dimly-lit , smoky room was her father's study and she lay on the floor in a tangle of blankets. Two lamps burned, their flames flickering in the breeze sweeping through the room.
     
    Concepcion tried to sit up and cried out as pain gripped her, stabbing from her back through her stomach. " Rosa !" she screamed.
     
    No one came. The pain clutched her fast, she couldn't move, couldn't think, could only moan. As it began to ease, it came to her why she was sleeping in the study. Rosa was gone , everyone was gone . She was alone. Her hand touched the smooth leather of the family Bible and she picked it up, hugging the Bible to her breast.
     
    The wind, strong and warm and dry, came from the eastern mountains. A Santa Ana wind, her father called it. The wind must have sprung up while she slept. Struggling to her feet, her eyes smarting from the smoke--there must be a fire somewhere-- Concepcion stumbled toward the open door.
     
    The corridor was smokier than the room and she gasped for breath as she staggered along. To her bewildered horror, flames licked at the staircase. The house was ablaze! How could she get past to the outside door? The courtyard door swung back and forth, open, banging as the wind blew it to and fro . Hadn't she shut all the doors earlier?
     
    Groping through the smoke, Concepcion stumbled through the door into the courtyard. Though wisps of smoke eddied from the house, she could breathe better. She reached the pepper tree before another pain struck her. When it finally passed, she released the low-hanging branch she'd clung to and stared at the house as she tried to make sense out of what was happening.
     
    Flames glowed red through the windows. The house was on fire. From the wind overturning burning candles? But why was the courtyard door open? She didn't think the wind could have unlatched it. The pains--did they mean the baby was coming? Fear paralyzed her. What was she to do?
     
    If I stay here I'll burn to death, she told herself. Since three sides of the courtyard were part of the house, the gate in the back wall offered the only escape. She staggered toward the gate.
     
    It seemed a mile across the courtyard to the back wall. The wind swirled her unbound hair across her face and into her eyes, at the same time making her choke on the smoke from the burning house. When Concepcion , gasping and retching, reached the gate she found it wouldn't open. As she yanked futilely at it, another pain struck. She dropped to her knees, her forehead against the gate and sobbed.
     
    In her desperation, she couldn't think of a single prayer, all she could do was mumble Rosa 's name, over and over as an invocation. As the pain eased, a terrible realization pierced through her. He's trying to kill me!
     
    Diarmid, her beloved husband, wanted to be rid of her--this was his doing. He'd crept back to the house in the darkness, set the fire, then opened the courtyard door to make it seem the wind had started the blaze from the burning candles. He'd left through the gate and, from the outside, fixed the gate so she couldn't open it, so she'd be