Free The Search for Kä by Randall Garrett Page A

commitment to become Captain and a deep need to be only one of the group. The look on her face brought back that pain.
    â€œBecause Yayshah came with you from the Valley,” I said. “It’s only here, among the Sharith, that the enormity of that simple act can be truly appreciated.”
    â€œBut that is not an achievement, in the sense of planning and accomplishing a difficult task,” she protested. “It—it merely
happened.
“
    The way
, I thought,
that it “merely happened” that Ricardo Carillo woke up in Markasset’s body.
    Tarani’s arms tensed against my shoulders. “Among the Lords of Eddarta, I should welcome this … acknowledgement of difference. There, only power commands respect, and only fear assures obedience. Among the Sharith, people whom I respect and care for as friends, this distance is disturbing, Rikardon. I am—it frightens me.”
    â€œGood,” I said.
    â€œExcuse me?” she said.
    â€œI said, ‘good,’” I answered. “You understand that when people treat you that way—sincerely, not out of fear as might be the case in Eddarta—it means they believe that you are wiser or stronger or more capable of being right than they are.
Because
you care for them, you don’t want their trust in you to hurt them. If that responsibility didn’t scare you, I’d be worried.”
    A frown crossed her face. “I hear contradiction in your words, Rikardon. First you say that it is not my association with you that brings me this special respect, and then you speak as though I have some role as leader among the Sharith. I do not.”
    â€œNot yet,” I amended. “Because you’re a Rider, you have a place in Thagorn. Because you’re a woman, the
first
woman Rider, nobody’s sure what that place should be.” I smiled at her. “Don’t be too concerned, darling. One thing we’ll do this evening is make it clear that you’re only a guest here, on your way to Eddarta.”
    â€œPerhaps that is why Shola seems so hostile toward me—she fears I will take her place of authority over the women in Thagorn. If that is so, then I need only assure her—”
    â€œYou need only let me do the talking, as you promised,” I reminded her.
    Her eyes glowed as she looked up at me. “This is part of the reason you asked my silence, is it not? To spare me the burden of confronting Shola to regain her friendship?”
    â€œIt is
part
of the reason,” I admitted. “Not the only one. It must be nearly time for dinner,” I said, and realized that I was getting anxious to have this done. “Shall we go?”
    â€œIn a moment,” she said. My anxiety faded as her arms slipped around my neck and her face tilted up to meet mine.
    Dharak and Shola were waiting in the dining room, already seated. Dharak stood up and came to the door to greet us when we arrived, his pleasure genuine, his admiration for Tarani obvious—to us and to Shola.
    Dharak’s wife was dressed in a tan sleeveless gown embroidered with gold thread at hem and neck. Jewels glittered at her wrists and throat. I surmised, from the quick flash of hurt in Tarani’s face, that the gown Shola had given her would have compared badly against Shola’s elegance.
    Tarani said nothing to Shola, but turned to Thymas, who was arriving right behind us, to thank him again for his gift.
    Dharak looked at Thymas suspiciously.
    Shola glared at Tarani.
    Thymas, whose capacity for subtlety seemed to be expanding, acknowledged Tarani’s thanks with a smile, then announced: “Dinner smells wonderful.”
    I sighed and pressed the boy’s shoulder as he passed me.
    It is always hot in Gandalara, but it was frosty around the dinner table that night. The meal was delicious: strips of well-roasted glith served with savory vegetables, a richly grained bread with a creamy spread, and spiced