what I’m trying to tell you. You can’t rush this or you could have permanent damage.”
“Like what kind of permanent damage?”
“Like the kind that means you could never regain full use of your right hand and arm.”
Oh shit.
Now I see why she looks so upset. My job, my livelihood, all my dreams depend on me being able to use my hands and arms to work on cars. Hell, I’d have been better off to have broken my leg than my arm. Or even my left arm. But not my right one. God almighty, not my right one!
What the hell am I gonna do about my garage? About the vehicles I’ve already been contracted to restore? I was just getting that part of my dream under way. It’s been slow going, but I could see it starting to take shape. But now… After this…
“Well, I guess I’ll just have to heal fast and right then.”
“I know you will. If you do what they tell you.”
“I will, I will,” I snap, already aggravated and ready to leave this conversation behind. “Who else is out there? Anybody?”
Mom shakes her head. “You’ve only been out of surgery for a couple of hours, Jeff. Give them some time.”
“Well, Trick’s on his honeymoon, I’m sure. And Jenna probably doesn’t even know yet, does she?”
“I talked to Leena. She called when she heard. She said she’d tell Trick, but I asked her to wait until they had a couple of days to enjoy their trip, and to tell them you were doing fine. I knew you wouldn’t want them to rush home to see you. You’ll still be here when they get back.”
“No, I wouldn’t have wanted that.” After a few seconds, I ask her again about Jenna. “So you didn’t call Jenna then?”
I hear her sigh. “Yes, I called Jenna.”
“Is she coming?”
“I don’t know. She hung up.”
She hung up? What the hell does that mean?
CHAPTER THIRTEEN- Jenna
I’ve never been so torn and conflicted in my whole life! Granted, I was just turning four when my mother died, but I still learned to hate the hospital. Luckily, she wanted to spend her last days at home, which she was able to do, but I remember the smell and the hopelessness, and riding home with my father while he cried quietly in the front seat. All in all, I hate hospitals. With a passion. I feel short of breath just thinking about going to visit Rusty. So much so that I just freaked and hung up on his mother, which I’ll have to call and apologize for. And I will. Later.
After I conquer step one, step one being Rusty.
Despite my fear of hospitals, despite the fact that I probably just deeply offended his mother, despite the fact that I made one of life’s biggest confessions and he said nothing, despite the fact that he totally bailed at the wedding, I’m going to see Rusty. At the hospital. Because I love him.
I was more than a little hurt when I found out that he left before the reception. Not only did he not find me and tell me, but he almost seemed to be avoiding me altogether. I just don’t understand it. The only thing I can figure is that my use of the L word freaked him out. I’m sure Rusty knows I love him, but I’ve never gone out on a limb and told him. Until last night.
Maybe this all adds up to the fact that he really doesn’t have deeper feelings for me. Maybe it’s just great sex and great companionship, nothing more.
It’s as I’m pulling on a pair of jeans, getting ready to leave that I find something else to be nervous about. What if he doesn’t want me there? What will I do then?
I push the thought out of my mind. I can’t think about that right now. I have to go. Not only is it the right thing to do, but it’s Rusty. And I love him. And he was almost taken from me. I have to see him again. I have to.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN- Rusty
Time feels different for some reason. Slower. Like every minute is an hour. Maybe because I’ve slept so much. Maybe because I can’t