Free Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Zipper Accidents by Uncle John’s

the dam, including a wider roadway across the top to accommodate their luxury carriages. This lowered the dam, bringing it only four feet above the spillway that kept it from overflowing.
    Heavy rains in May 1889 raised the lake to within a few feet of the roadway. By the morning of May 31, water was pouring over the top. Despite the club’s last-minute attempts to reinforce it, at 3:10 p.m. the dam gave way, sending a 35-foot wall of water and trees—not to mention the remains of the dam—gushing toward Johnstown, 14 miles downstream. Survivors said the sound was “a roar like thunder.”
    Ten minutes after the water reached Johnstown, four square miles of the city were gone. Sixteen hundred homes were leveled. An official telegraphed Pittsburgh, saying simply, “Johnstown is annihilated.” All told, 2,209 people died.

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PROFESSOR RALPH
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    A Texas high school science teacher named Brandi Bastas nearly killed herself and her students in September 2012. She was showing the class how to identify certain proteins and amino acids. But she failed to demonstrate how to keep two volatile substances—nitric acid and cyanide—from combining. A little spill from a test tube onto the lab table was all it took.
    Bastas told everyone to get away from the table. Then she ran into the hallway and started vomiting. Then one of her students felt a burning rash on his skin. Then another one did, too. Then more had trouble breathing. Describing the scene, student Karin Ortiz said everyone was “freaked out.”
    When the teacher and five affected students arrived at the nurse’s office, school administrators thought it might be a good idea to evacuate the classroom and the adjacent rooms. Thankfully, the chemicals dissipated before any serious injuries occurred, but the victims had to be treated at a local hospital.
     
    “BUT SHE FAILED TO DEMONSTRATE HOW TO KEEP TWO VOLATILE SUBSTANCES—NITRIC ACID AND CYANIDE—FROM COMBINING.”

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BAD TRIP
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    T he major cities of Europe are not all that far apart geographically, especially since a rail system unites the Continent. In May 1981, the Elthams, a couple from Dover, England, decided to take a day trip to Boulogne, in northern France, a distance of about 70 miles. They had a nice time sightseeing and shopping, but because they were unable to read French, they misread street signs and ended up wandering away from the town center and getting lost. Fortunately, they were able to explain the situation to some strangers, who gave them a ride back to the Boulogne train station, where they decided to take a train to Paris. The ticket took up most of the cash they had left.
     
    “AGAIN, AS THEY COULDN’T READ FRENCH, THEY STAYED ON THE TRAIN TOO LONG AND ENDED UP IN LUXEMBOURG, NOT PARIS.”
    Again, as they couldn’t read French, they stayed on the train too long and ended up in Luxembourg, not Paris. Having been awake for over 24 hours during their odyssey, they fell asleep on the train ride back to Paris…and woke up in Basel, Switzerland. Swiss police sent them back to Belfort, France, where they were told that in order to make the Boulogne connection, they’d have to getto Montbeliard. Short on funds, they walked…15 miles. The town housed them for free in a hostel and allowed them to call home to Dover, but they couldn’t reach any family or friends.
    The Elthams then decided to get temp jobs in Montbeliard to earn money to get back to Dover, but again, they couldn’t speak French, and there were no jobs to be had anyway. After a couple of days, the police escorted them back to Belfort. Once again, the Elthams wandered off and ended up walking 38 miles to Vesoul, from which they took a train into Paris. At the Paris train station, they read the schedules wrong and hopped a train to Bonn, Germany, where German police dumped them out just over the border, in Switzerland.
    There, their luck changed. A policeman drove them to Boulogne, where they spent 24 hours in a