Free Off the Cuff by Carson Kressley Page A

a dress shirt underneath, although I prefer a T-shirt. You should also have one or two V-neck sweaters. They’re a bit harder to wear and tend to look a little guidofied, so it is crucial that they be worn with a woven shirt with a collar. A T-shirt under a V-neck is a no-no.
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    If you’re feeling a little frisky, you might want to throw a cardigan or a zip-up sweater into the mix. The cardigan is not just for Fred Rogers anymore, and can actually be very chic. The important thing here is fit, fit, fit. An illfitting cardigan is the first step to homelessness.
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    Last but not least, man’s best friend. No, not your right hand or your golden retriever, but the trusty turtleneck. Every man should own at least one black turtleneck. They are chic, slim, and versatile like me!
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    Sweaters are all about the fiber of which they are constructed. When you buy a sweater, you should really consider the climate in which you live and how much use you’re going to get out of it. There’s no color-coded fiber chart of the U.S., like they have for flower bulbs, but I think you can figure it out. If you live in Hawaii, you’re not going to get much use out of those bulky fisherman knits, and linen roll-necks won’t be that helpful during Michigan winters.
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    Guys know what cotton and polyester are, but you don’t know yarns, so here’s a little cheat sheet.

Cashmere
    What’s all the fuss about cashmere? It’s as expensive as cosmetic surgery. Wait, let me think of a good straight guy analogy. Cashmere is the flat screen TV of yarns. It’s the Super Bowl of sweaters.
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    Cashmere comes from a goat, imagine that. Specifically, it’s from the soft belly hair of a goat from the Kashmir region of India. It’s expensive because it takes forever for our goat friends to grow enough hair to make one sweater. It’s a luxury because it’s super warm and cuddly. Cashmere is cute cubed—cute, cute, cute!
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    But alas, all cashmere is not created equal. Just like beef, where you have prime, choice, and grade A, there are different quality levels of fibers. Some manufacturers use a very low-grade cashmere, so you really have to feel the quality and comparison shop a little. It’s all right, cop a good feel. This is one place where you won’t get sued if you touch.
    How to Make Friends with Cashmere
    Ordinarily, a decent cashmere sweater will run you between $150 and $400. I don’t want you to have to take out a second mortgage to afford one, so here’s a useful tip. Head to a department store in the few days after Christmas. You can often still find a very good selection at deeply reduced prices—often as much as 50 percent off. And once you bring your little cashmere friend home, don’t neglect its needs. You might think it best to send your cashmere to a professional dry cleaner, but you need to resist that urge. Dry-cleaning strips cashmere of the essential natural oils that make it so soft and cuddly. Just wash it yourself with a capful of Woolite and lay it flat to dry.
Merino
    This is the poor man’s cashmere, a very popular and less costly alternative. Merino is actually a very high-quality, luxurious wool that comes from the merino sheep of New Zealand. They’re a little bit dressier than other wool sweaters, they’re a little bit cooler, and a nice alternative to the more expensive fibers. Think of your merino sweaters as baby steps on the glorious road to cashmere.
Lambswool
    Lambswool falls in the same category as merino—it’s more lightweight than regular wool and generally a little finer quality and more dressed up. Because it comes from baby sheep, the fibers are younger and softer.
Wool
    You probably already know that wool comes from our little sheep friends. Natural fibers are always better because when woven into a sweater, they do exactly what the fiber intended to do in nature: keep the animal warm and