Free Just A Small Town Girl: A New Adult Romantic Comedy by Jessica Pine

to find the dick jokes in Shakespeare. I even learned to read The Scarlet Letter without throwing it across the room; do you know how difficult that is? And it's all completely useless. I have a degree that basically says I'm better at reading books than other people."
     "So what? You're smart. You can do whatever you want. What do you want to do?"
     She was fiddling with the little paper tube that had once held brown sugar for her coffee. She had rolled it into a tiny strip and was now trying to tie it in a knot.
     "Your Aunt said you wanted to write," I said.
     Lacie arched an eyebrow. "Fuck her."
     I backed off.
     "No, really. Fuck her. Every time I see her lately she's like Stewie from Family Guy - 'How you coming on with that novel, huh?' She's not a bad person as such, but deep down she's kind of bitch. She's always been like that, ever since she was little, Dad says. Constantly comparing herself to other people. If I ever managed to write a book Aunt Cassandra would be green - pea green."
     "So do it. Do it to piss her off."
     "I don't know," she said. "I would, but I get so far and then it's like there's this little voice breathing down my neck." She made a puppet mouth out of her hand and snapped it open and shut just below her ear. "And it says 'You suck, you suck, you suck.' Then sometimes I get it in the other ear too, so it's in stereo. Like those shoulder devils and angels in old cartoons - you know the ones? Except mine are both evil and they both hate me. So I hit the delete key and go back to price tags and inventory."
     I could feel her foot against mine under the table. "I guess you could say I don't exactly have my life together," she said.
     "We're quite a pair, huh?"
     "We are, yes."
     She leaned forward on her elbows, her foot slipping between my ankles. Her eyes were the color of brown sugar and she squinted a little as she drew closer; I wondered if those glasses were to correct long sight or short. I could tell her mind was going interesting places - her lips were slightly parted and her foot stroked up and down the back of my calf. It was hard to make her out, but she was right - we were quite a pair.
     "Do you want to get out of here?" she said.
     "I thought we were on a date?"
     "We are," she said, the tip of her tongue flickering briefly over her upper lip. "Isn't that the point of a date?"
     "The point?" I said. "What do you mean?"
     "Don't play dumb," she said. "You know what I mean. We can sit here and pretend it's 1955 or we can act like adults and cut to the chase."
     "Cut to the chase?"
     "Fuck," she said. "We can fuck. That's why you asked me here, right? Because you're sick of trying to play grab-ass in the office and to be honest I'm sick of you trying. Maybe we just need to get it out of our system."
     At this point I think I was supposed to say something like 'No, I'm here because I like you', or tell her I was deeply into her as a human being, but instead I said 'Okay' and picked up the check before her huge raw-boned uncle Jerry or whoever he was spotted the lump in my jeans and correctly guessed my intentions towards his sweet little girl.
     "Can we go back to your place?" she said.
     I shook my head. There was no way I was ready to admit that I lived in a trailer, and besides that there was a good chance of being murdered by an enormous, angry biker. "It's kind of complicated right now," I said.
     "It's cool," she said. "I get it. You live with your parents, don't you?"
     She was halfway across the street before I could even think of a reply. The wind caught the hem of her polka-dot skirt and for a second I thought I saw white skin and black lace. No panty hose to tear this time. I hurried after her.
     She snuck down the alleyway at the side of the shop and took out her key to the workshop. "In here?" I said. "What happens if your Dad comes down?"
     "He won't," she said. "Once he locks up for the night this place may as well not exist to him. It's like