Free Breathe by Ani San

Or breakfast?’
    I wondered if I ha any food in the fridge. I was supposed to go shopping for groceries today.
    ‘Coffee sounds nice.’
    I headed f or my espresso machine and turned it on. There was a rack on the counter with different types of coffee capsules. I picked Caffé Intenso for myself, and held it up for him to choose what he wanted. My robe opened slightly as I stretched and revealed my bra. I pulled my hand back when I noticed, and closed the robe with my other hand.
    ‘ I can make this if you want to get dressed,’ he said, and picked the same capsule for him self.
    ‘ That’s probably a good ide,’ I blushed, ‘the mugs are in the cabinet above.’
    ‘ If you find any male clothes, I would be most happy to borrow some,’ he said as I walked out of the kitchen.
    ‘ Sorry, I gave them away to the last man I brought home,’ I laughed, relieved that the tension was gone.
    I went into my bedroom, and looked over at the place where he had been sleeping. I wanted to lie down and inhale the scent of him, but I didn’t. I would save that for when he left. I opened the sliding doors and found a pair of navy pants that reached below my knee, and then put on a grey tank top with double-crossing straps in the back. I was in a hurry to get back to him, I didn’t want to miss a single minute before he left. He held the mug up for me when I re-entered the kitchen.
    ‘ Thank you,’ I said as I grabbed it. ‘Are you hungry?’
    I started opening and closing the cabinets and the fridge, only to confirm that the choices were limited.
    ‘ I’m sorry, but I only have some cereal and some fruits. Can I make you some?’
    ‘ No thanks, I’m fine. Have you seen my phone?’ His voice was distracted, and he moved into the living room.
    This is it. My heart sank while I was contemplating saying goodbye to him. I took a deep breath and followed him. He had already found the phone, and was sitting in the same place he had yesterday. I didn’t look up as I sat down beside him. He was reading messages with a frown on his face.
    ‘ I need to make some calls,’ he said as he rose. I remained seated, aware that he needed some privacy. He was walking back to the kitchen, holding his phone to his ear. ‘Hang on, Anna. Do you have any plans for today?’
    I didn’t realise he was speaking to me at first. But he had turned around and was obliviously waiting for something. He was asking me of my plans. Why?
    ‘ No, not really. I need to go get some grocery, though.’ My voice sounded as insecure as I felt. Maybe he wasn’t leaving yet. I didn’t let myself hope that. 
    He turned back around and continued to the kitchen. ‘Hey Anna, I’m at Sara’s. In Kensington. What...? No, I had it on mute, I just got up.’
    He actually told her were he had stayed the night. My body froze. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, it was kind of inevitable. My apartment wasn’t that big. Besides, he hadn’t closed the kitchen door. I continued to listen. Not because I was curious, well maybe that too, but mostly because I loved to hear his voice. The sound of it made me tingle all over. And it was fascinating the way his voice shifted when he talk to Anna, in comparison when he talked to me. It was softer with me and warmer. Or maybe my imagination was running wild.
    ‘ I know that,’ I heard him continue. ‘You have to cancel it. I don’t care, just do it! And give the message to Jules please.’
    The mention of her stung in me. It was my guilty conscience taking a stab. I knew him being here was wrong, no matter how right it felt. He was about to finish the call when he abruptly came back, holding his hand over his phone, looking at me.
    ‘ What did you need at the store?’
    ‘ Just some food,’ I answer, not sure where he was going with this.
    ‘ What kind of food? Anything special?’ His hand was still covering his phone.
    ‘ No, it’s ok, I can get it tomorrow.’ My voice trailed of as he hold up his hand to me and spoke