Free Love Forever After (Candle Light Series) by Christina Ow Page A

to kill yourself?” She yelled tears dancing in her eyes, “you and Morris are all I have left and you want to off yourself!”
    “I wasn’t trying to take my own life,” I defended myself.
    “Of course not, you were just trying to learn the anatomy of your arm. What better way than, cutting it open, as if you were gutting a fish!” She yelled sarcastically.
    I looked at Morris for help but he looked determined to stay out of it. I turned back to Sandra’s fuming face and tried to find a delicate way to put the next few crazy words. “I did that... to bring Kristy back.” I did sound crazy. If mother heard me she would definitely get me locked up.
    “What?” Morris blurted out. Sandra just stared at me shocked. If they didn’t think I was crazy before, they did now.
    “We were discussing the baby thing. When I said no, she said she didn’t have any other reason to stay around, so she left, for good this time.” I felt a pain in my chest as I said the words out.  If she didn’t come back when I lay bleeding in our kitchen, she was never coming back, no matter what I did.
    “What?” Sandra echoed.
    “You told me to ask her so I did.” I felt like I was shrinking under their perplexed this-man-has-lost-his-mind stare.
    “I’m going to pretend I understood what you said and ask you the part that I do understand.” She shook her head and laughed nervously, “I can’t believe I’m asking this but what did she say?”
    “She said that she wants me to have the baby.” 
    Morris moved closer to my bed. “So are you?”
    “I don’t know.”
    “We’ll talk about that when you are discharged. Right now I need to convince the doctors not to admit you to a psych ward. In the mean time Morris, watch him and make sure he doesn’t try any transplant surgery on himself.” Sandra spoke as she walked out of my room.
    Morris sat on my bed and looked at me for a while before he broke out in a loud laughter.
    “What’s so funny?”
    “I’m just imaging what your mother would be saying right now.”
    She wouldn’t think twice about committing me. “You didn’t tell her did you?” 
    “No, but we told Ron. I should call him and tell him how you are. He’s in Peru.” Morris walked out of my room his phone to his ear.
    I looked at my heavily bandaged arm wondering how out of it I was. But I was very willing to die if it meant seeing her again. The thought of living without her hurt me so much but she was right, she couldn’t stay with me, that’s not how death worked.
    She was dead and never coming back.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    Chapter Eight
    After a week in hospital I was released, of course with a parole officer namely Sandra. She watched every move I made, cooked the food I ate and tasted all the liquids I took to make sure I wasn’t trying to poison myself. If I stayed in the shower more than ten minutes she would knock on the door until I opened it, done or not. Once I tried to ignore her and she got someone to break down the door. I tried to explain I wasn’t trying to kill myself and she would nod and agree like she was trying to appease a five year old child. I never before thought of suicide but I found myself seriously considering it with her around for the last two weeks.
    I loved her and I understood her fears but she was going over board with all of this. She was exhausting the little sanity I had left. Morris came to my rescue and took her away for the day, but that didn’t stop her from calling me every half an hour. I made it a point to answer each and every call. When she knew that I was okay and still kicking, it would keep her from coming back too soon.
    I sat in my living room and turned on the flat screen. I had a six pack of beer at my feet, a bag of chips on my right, a bowl of pop corns on my left and a tray with six burgers on the table. I was going to enjoy my freedom while the warden was away.  I looked at my left arm. It wasn’t as heavily