Free The Knitting Circle Rapist Annihilation Squad by Derrick Jensen, Stephanie McMillan

the way.”
    The chief leans forward. “‘All the way’ as in, come clean and become an informant? Or, accelerate the murders?”
    Sandy answers, “All the way’ as in change her hair color.”
    Rico wails, “I can’t take it.”
    Sandy keeps going, “And if she does, should she whisper with shimmering gold highlights, or shout with a shocking bright red-orange or a dramatic sable-black?”
    Rico sways in his chair.
    Sandy says, “And after that, is she going to want to go with an Aveda Black Malva Color Conditioner, or more of a Pantene Pro-V Brunette Expressions Daily Color Enhancing Shampoo?”
    Rico clutches his heart, starts to fall from his chair. His last words before hitting the floor are, “Mother of Mercy, is this the end of Rico?”

C HAPTER 5
    Five men sit on mismatched thrift-store sofas in a room lit by four weak and failing light bulbs set in three different yet equally hideous lamp fixtures. One fixture is composed of taxidermied squirrel frozen in the act of scratching a ceramic pine stump, with a shade crafted of old neckties. Another is a plastic monkey wearing a vest and holding a light bulb in each hand. A third has a red pump shoe for a base, and a fishnet stocking—clad female mannequin leg for a post. The bare bulb sticks out at a fifteen-degree angle at the top.
    The room is carpeted in cruddy red shag, with walls lined with peeling fake wood paneling. Crucifixes compete with praying hands for wall space around a poster of Jesus wearing camo fatigues and pointing at the viewer, with the caption, “Jesus wants YOU to save some souls.” A fiberboard bookshelf held together with duct tape stands in one corner. Nestled within are seven stolen Gideon Bibles, the complete
Left Behind
series, a clearly-intentionally-mangled sacrificial copy of
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone,
a DVD of
Cats,
a CD of
Ted Nugent Plays Gospel Favorites,
and an ancient and well-read copy of
Everything You Always Wanted to Know about Sex, But Were Afraid to Ask,
all book-ended by a pair of carved wooden NASCAR Jesuses.
    The men wear baby blue T-shirts with the letters MAWAR stenciled beneath an awkwardly designed logo: the circle/arrow symbol for “male” surrounding a clenched fist with a cross sprouting from the second knuckle like an upraised middle finger.
    The first man, clearly the leader, says, “The cops still hath their heads up their asses, fuckin’ wankers.”
    The rest of the group responds with a hearty “Amen!”
    The first man continues, “These pussies hath not the balls to even catch a bunch of dumb females. We hath to perform their job for them while they waveth around their dicks.”
    The group responds, “Praise the Lord!”
    One of the MAWAR members, Billy Bob, asks another, “Brother Zebadiah, hast thou initiated the holy plan to grab that heathen ditz Jasmine?”
    Zebadiah responds, “I have, Brother Billy Bob. I have seen the infidel many times at a pernicious den of sin called Xanadu. I have seen her even this last night. And I have called her by the name of ‘Fox-ay.’ Having seen this woman many times, I feel she is now in the palm of my hand, ready to feel the mighty fury of the
Lord.”
    Billy Bob nods. “Brother, you got you some holy fuckin’ nads of steel to come in such close proximity to such a Jezebel. What comes next?”
    Zebadiah answers, “Phase Two of our holy plan begins in three days.”
    â€œPraise Jesus. But why not tomorrow?”
    â€œIt’s the three-day rule. If you call one of these wanton hussies before three days, she turns down even the Holiest of Holy men. If you wait three days, she’s yours.”
    It is late at night. Marilyn sits alone in her family’s dark living room. The front door opens. “Mom?” Marilyn calls.
    Gina enters and asks, “What are you doing up so late?”
    â€œWhat