Free Evidence of Marriage by Ann Voss Peterson Page A

handle my meeting with Kane? Or, God help me, even Perreth?”
    â€œYou haven’t heard anything I’ve said, have you?”
    On the contrary, she’d heard every word, every hitch in his voice, every loaded pause. She could feel the intensity of them vibrating in her bones. “I’ve heard enough to know we shouldn’t be together.”
    His footsteps sounded behind her. He gripped her arm and turned her to face him. “Losing you once almost killed me. Losing you, to Kane, to the damn copycat…”
    His face was so close, she could reach out herhand and trace the line of dark stubble on his cheek. She could lean forward, just a little, and find herself in his arms.
    â€œIt’s not going to happen. And the only way I can make sure it doesn’t is to be next to you when he tries.”
    She looked down, unable to peer into his eyes one second longer. She’d been an idiot to think anything between her and Reed wouldn’t be personal. Looking at him across a crowded room would be personal.
    But where did that leave her? Where did it leave them both? “I can’t go back, Reed. You say you almost lost me, well I lost myself long before our wedding day.” That is, if she’d ever found herself in the first place.
    She could feel his gaze on her, his eyes searching, struggling to understand.
    She didn’t know if she could help him. Not any more than she’d been able to when she’d given back his ring. She wasn’t sure she understood any of this herself.
    Taking a deep breath, she met his eyes. She had to try. It was only fair to him that she try. “I’ve always been what other people wanted. My mother. My father.”
    Reed’s face grew hard, as if he sensed what was coming.
    â€œYou.”
    His eyes darkened, as if bruised. “I never asked you to be anything but who you are.”
    She longed to run her hand along his cheek, to smooth away the hurt, to take back the words. But she couldn’t let herself. She had to tell him the truth. At least the small part of it she had figured out.
    She took a step to the side, putting a little more distance between them, hoping it would help her think. “I know you never asked me to be what you wanted. You never even told me what you wanted. Not in words. You didn’t have to. I sensed it. I gave you what you were looking for before you even knew you wanted it.”
    He shook his head. “We were happy together. We loved each other.”
    â€œI loved you.”
    â€œBut you don’t believe I loved you?” His expression didn’t change, but anger sharpened the edges of his voice.
    â€œI never gave you the chance. I never even let you know who I really was. I was afraid to.”
    â€œAfraid? Why?” He took a step toward her, closing the distance between them. “I didn’t do anything to make you afraid.”
    â€œI didn’t say you did, Reed. It’s me. It’s who I am. It’s what I do. I make myself what others want me to be.”
    He watched her under lowered brows. Back to the bedside lamp, his eyes blended with shadow.
    She couldn’t tell if he was following her or not, but she had to push on. She had to make him see. “I didn’t even know I was doing it until I was tied up in that dark cabin waiting to die. I had to draw on myself to survive. On the strength inside me.” She closed her eyes. The room spun out of control. Just like the days and nights in the cabin. The raw vulnerability. The fear. “Reed, there was nothing for me to draw on. There was nothing there.”
    He touched her arm, sending chills racing along her nerves. “You were frightened out of your mind, Diana. Anyone would feel that way.”
    â€œNo. You would never feel that way, Reed. You know who you are. You know where your strength lies.”
    â€œI’m a detective. I have training to fall back on. It’s not the same