Free Suffocate by Xavier Neal

shining at me full of a look I’m not sure any lover has ever given me before. Complete adoration.
    I’m in trouble. How the hell am I supposed to walk away from someone who looks at me like he’s sees more than just what he can use me for? Got any tips? Because right now I need all the help I can get.
     

 
    Chapter 12
    Luke
    It has been hell. Pure and utter hell. And I love what I do. I love helping people. I do so well in the ER because I manage to keep a level head in situations most people panic, but the shifts are long and the things that seeing the shit I do can do to you, take their toll if you aren’t fortunate. Or if you don’t have a support system like I do.
    “Can you stop looking at me like that?” Maxx whines shoving a spoonful of green Jell-O in her mouth. “It’s sugar free for crying out loud. I’m eating this blasphemy of dessert because of you,” she points the spoon at me, “insisting that I cut down my sugar.”
    “I would rather you not eat it at all.”
    “Well that’s not happening, so make your peace with me eating this jiggly disappointment also known as Jell-O.”
    “After what happened I just...I worry.”
    She almost lost the baby and I feel it was my fault. I should’ve seen it coming. I should’ve predicted it. I should’ve paid attention to the signs. Another reason I don’t think getting involved with Stuart is a good idea. I can’t afford to not have all my attention ready to take care of Maxx if something goes wrong again. And before you go calling me a Debbie Downer, I’ve heard three stories of miscarriages this shift alone.
    “I know you do.” She reaches her hand across the table. “You mean well.” I give her a short nod, which is when she pushes, “What’s up? You’re bumming kind of hard. I mean more than typical bumming. Something happen?”
    The pair of lifeless eyes of the 16 year old we couldn’t save from an overdose flash through my mind.
    I know I can’t save everyone, but I can at least try, especially those that I love.
    “Ready?” Stuart surprisingly appears at the table beside Maxx.
    “What are you doing here?” I question rudely.
    “Well hello to you too,” he chuckles.
    Shit. Manners. Remind me. I hate how he does that to me.
    “Kellar put me in charge of driving Maxx—”
    “I am not Ms. Daisy.”
    “And I am not Morgan Freeman, so we’re good,” Stuart’s quick comeback causes her to nod in agreement. He turns his words to me. “Kellar knew she wanted to come see you since you had been working back to back shifts so I offered to drive her while he went to the gym.”
    “He’s hiding.” Maxx stabs the jiggling dessert that’s mocking her.
    Curious I raise my eyebrows. “Why?”
    “Well right now he says the wrong thing about 99 percent of the time.”
    “He’s always said the wrong thing about 99 percent of the time,” I counter. “That’s not new.”
    “Well now instead of his entire foot in his mouth, he’s learning to deep throat his calf.”
    “Imagery.” I shake my head rapidly. “This family and graphic images.”
    Maxx proudly snickers, as my eyes land on Stuart who quickly offers, “Wanna stretch your legs with me while she finishes the tiny green blob in her bowl?”
    “Take him.” Maxx waves us off. “He needs a pick me up and listening to me bitch about why this tastes better with alcohol clearly isn’t helping. Besides by the time you walk back this way I will have managed to get un-wedged from this seat.”
    I stand, nod at Stuart, and lean down to plant a kiss on Maxx’s forehead. “You’re gonna be okay. Call Kellar and make up.”
    She mumbles something that sounds like ‘asshole’ as I walk off with Stuart out of the cafeteria door. Once we’re alone in the almost vacant long hallway, he inquires, “So what’s eating you Nurse Man?”
    “Why do people keep asking that?”
    “Because you don’t hide your emotions well.”
    “Thanks.” I bite.
    Okay so maybe I don’t, but