Free Die Once Live Twice by Lawrence Dorr

still a mystery to him, but he was as cheerful a person as Patrick had met.
    Even Abel’s good humor could not forestall the enervating boredom. Patrick’s whiskey intake increased weekly to dull his pain and combat his lifeless days. Whiskey was more plentiful than opiate drugs so patients drank freely and often. Patricia was there daily to minister to his needs, and the other men remarked on how she would always spend more time with Patrick than with anyone else. “Show her what you’ve got, and she’ll lift her skirts for you,” Abel laughed.
    Patrick dismissed this. “Why would I have a broodmare when I already have the finest thoroughbred in my stable?” Still, Patricia seemed prettier every day, and if a man’s need became too strong, it was only healthy to ease it. Katherine will never know, he rationalized. His conversations with Patricia became longer and more personal.
    One day she paused a moment while straightening his bed and took off the bonnet that covered her hair. As she talked, she swiped a stray strand of hair back into place and Patrick almost gasped. He hesitated and then said, “Your hair looks pretty today.” She had pulled her red hair into a soft bun, leaving a few strands hanging free on each side.
    “Why, Patrick, thank you.” She blushed, and then smiled as she put her bonnet back on.
    “Nurse O’Reilly!” A doctor yelled out from across the room.
    Patricia nodded to him and looked back at Patrick. “Is there anything more I can get for you?” Patrick was truly the most handsome man she had ever seen and her body roared with desire each time she placed her hand on him.
    “More of your time,” he said quietly. She smiled enigmatically and nodded to him as she walked away.
    The next day Patrick tore open an envelope from Katherine. The mail was not reliable, no matter that she wrote daily. He called out loudly to his roommates, “Thank God for the mail. If the Rebs blow up our rails, I will die of loneliness.”
    “No, you won’t,” Abel hollered back at him. “You will always have that Nurse O’Reilly!” Patrick ignored him as he read the letter from Katherine.
Dearest Patrick,
    I hope your days are better. I go to Mass every morning to pray for you. I know God will heal you. When I volunteer my hours at Pennsylvania Hospital I see you in every soldier in traction. It must be so hard. You love adventure so much that spending day after day in bed must be awful. I will have you transported back to Philadelphia as soon as your doctor says you can come home. Meantime, I plan to visit you as soon as the Army says I can safely travel to you. I go to bed every night with memories of our bodies together.
    The business is doing well...
    Patrick laid the letter from Katherine on his chest. He really didn’t care about the business. I treasure the words “Love, Katherine,” the most. Pangs of guilt rippled through him. How could he think of betraying Katherine’s love?
    As the days passed slowly, Patrick’s only pleasure was when Patricia visited. During the day, while she was working, he would have a couple of whiskeys and nap. Whiskey was his best friend.
    “I’ve come for your evening bath.” Her voiced wakened him from his whiskey haze and immediately lifted his spirit.
    “I’ve been waiting for you. Even though it’s evening, you are my sunshine.”
    “Ah, a poet.” She dallied with him for a half hour while she bathed him and they talked. He could not hide how much he desired her.
    The next week, when a letter from Katherine arrived, he cheered loudly and waved it at his roommates. “What you goin’ to do with Nurse O’Reilly when she comes? That young filly wants to feel your seed. Any fool can see that,” Abel called out.
    “Animals. You’re all wolves in soldiers’ clothes.”
    “Many a fine lad has broken his wife’s heart back home when a young nurse takes him to the meadow across the way and ends up with child.”
    Patrick quit listening while he read