Free Full Scoop by Janet Evanovich and Charlotte Hughes

added. “And the answer is still N-O .”
    “All you would have to do is pick out a man you like,” Queenie went on as though she hadn’t heard a word Maggie said. “And leave the rest up to me. Mel is right. There has to be one man in this town you find attractive. All it takes is one.”
    The back door opened and Zack stepped through. Four sets of eyes stared at him.
    “Why is everybody staring at me?” he asked. “If you tell me I have ketchup on my face it’s going to be hard to explain because I haven’t been near the stuff.”
    “Um, we were just trying to decide what kind of pizza to order,” Maggie said, “and wondering what you like.”
    He shrugged. “I’m easy to please.”
    “Me too,” Everest said.
    “I’ll call Crusty’s,” Mel said, going for the phone. “I’ll order one large pepperoni and one with everything.”
    Zack looked at Maggie. “I forgot to ask you earlier,” he said. “What’s the deal with the goat?”
    Maggie’s hand flew to her mouth. “Oh, no! Poor Butterbean!”
    Mel stopped in her tracks and slapped her palm against her forehead. “I forgot we had a dumb goat. It’s hard to think with Aunt Queenie doing her smelly voodoo thing.”
    “Be careful what you say about my practices,” Queenie said sternly. “I’d hate to have to put the root on you.”
    Mel rolled her eyes back so far in her head that Maggie was certain she’d caught a glimpse of her brain.
    “And don’t you roll those eyes at me, young lady,” Queenie said. “You know I don’t tolerate eye-rolling. You keep rolling those eyes, and you might just find them stuck like that for a while.”
    “Okay, I’ll do this instead.” Mel stepped closer; raised her fingers to her eyes and turned the lids inside out.
    “Oh, Lord!” Queenie cried, backing away and giving a huge shudder. “Stop that!”
    Zack grinned and looked at Maggie who simply shook her head. “Ignore it,” she whispered.
    “Wow!” Everest said. “That’s the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen. How long can she do that?”
    Mel stuck her head forward, giving Queenie a better view. “I can’t find my eyeballs,” the girl wailed.
    “Get away from me,” Queenie cried, grimacing, “or I’m going to smack your backside so hard with this wooden spoon that you won’t be able to sit for a week.”
    “Cut it out, Mel,” Maggie said, trying to concentrate on what to do with the goat.
    Mel turned toward her mother’s voice, arms flailing. “Is that you, Mom?” she said, putting her hand on Maggie’s face and exploring it with her fingertips.
    Zack and Everest laughed.
    Maggie’s expression was deadpan, even though it was hard to remain straight-faced over her daughter’s antics, no matter how juvenile. “Please fix your eyes,” she said calmly.
    “They’re gone. Aunt Queenie stole them for her witch’s brew.”
    Maggie shrugged. “Guess that means you can’t order pizza. Too bad.”
    Finally, the girl rubbed her eyes and blinked several times until the lids were back in place. She headed for the phone.
    Queenie looked relieved.
    “I forgot about Butterbean too,” Maggie told Zack, feeling sorry for the little pygmy with the kooky-looking eyes that nobody seemed to want. “I don’t have any goat food. I don’t even have a place to keep her. Except for maybe the garage. She’ll need hay.”
    “I can get it,” Everest said. “Carter’s Hardware and Feed is ten minutes from here.”
    “Take the van,” Zack said, tossing him the keys.
    Maggie was relieved. “I really appreciate it,” she said. She reached for her purse and pulled out a twenty-dollar bill. “Go ahead and grab two bales of hay if you have enough money.”
    “Oh, wait,” Zack said and pulled out his wallet. “How about picking up half a dozen good-quality night-lights from the hardware department.”
    “Wow, you must really be afraid of the dark,” Mel said as the others gave him a questioning look.
    Zack shrugged. “You never know when