Free Out of Heaven's Grasp by V.J. Chambers Page B

so bad. I could do this. If this was the trial that God required of me, I could face it.
    Nevertheless, not my will, but thine, be done.
    I lay there, my eyes closed, and something like peace washed over me.
    And there was a pounding noise at the window.
    I sat up, startled. It was already dark outside, and most people in the house were asleep. Still, that knocking noise was loud. I ran over the window.
    Jesse was outside, peering in at me.
    I yanked the window open, my heart leaping at the sight of him. “What are you doing here? I thought they cast you out.”
    “They did,” he said. “I came back for my truck.” He reached through the window for my hands. “I came back for you. Come with me, Abby.”
    I pulled my hands away. Hadn’t I just made peace with this decision as a test sent by God? “No.”
    He pushed the window up even higher. “Come on.”
    “Jesse, I can’t.” I looked back at the door to my room. What if someone heard us talking? “You have to go.”
    “Abby.” He fixed me with his blue eyes.
    Oh, why was he so nice to look at?
    “Okay, I’ll climb out the window, but only so that we can talk somewhere else, where no one can hear us.”
    He grinned at me.
    My heart swelled.
    Carefully, I climbed out the window. Jesse put his hands on my waist and lowered me to the ground.
    Once I had both feet on the ground, I realized how close our bodies were. I expected Jesse to let go of me, but he didn’t.
    He pushed me back against the side of the house, and suddenly his mouth was on mine, and he was kissing me.
    I’d never felt anything like it my life. Sweetness burst through my body. His lips were soft. His tongue was softer. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and I kissed him back.
    And we kissed for a very long time.
    But this was a sin. This was a temptation sent by the devil. Jesse had been cast out of the community, and that meant that he was now part of the wickedness of the world. I couldn’t let this happen.
    So, with effort, I pushed him away. “We can’t,” I managed. My limbs felt weak. The kiss had felt so good.
    He looked up at the open window, then back at me. He grabbed me by the hand and tugged me away.
    We ran away from the house, deep into the shadows of the night. When we were out of earshot, we stopped.
    His face was mangled and hurt, but there was something wild about him, something in his eyes, and it made him even more appealing than he’d ever been before. I found myself unable to keep my eyes off of his body. His broad shoulders. His powerful hands.
    I wanted…
    I didn’t know what I wanted, but it frightened me. I took several steps back from him.
    “Why?” he said.
    I didn’t understand. “What?”
    “Why won’t you come with me? What have you got here?”
    I bit my lip. “It’s not about that. It’s about doing what God commands.”
    “Don’t say that shit, Abby.”
    I winced at the expletive. “Don’t talk like that.”
    “I mean it,” he said. “This isn’t what you want. You want to play music. You want to travel. Come with me.”
    I thought about it for a minute. Climbing into Jesse’s truck and leaving the community behind forever. Forging our own lives somewhere else. Excitement surged through me, but then it was replaced with terror. “It wouldn’t work. They’d come after me. I’m engaged now.”
    “Yeah, I heard,” he said. “To Bob Carroll? He’s already got three wives. And he’s too old. It’s disgusting, Abby.”
    I wanted to cry. I wrapped my arms around myself. “I have to do it, though. It’s what God wants.”
    “No, it’s not,” said Jesse. “It’s what Bob Carroll wants.”
    I stared at my shoes. “He’d come after me, though. He would.”
    I’d seen it twice. In both cases, a young girl had run away to escape a marriage to an older man. But the community had rallied together and gone after her. Both girls had been brought back, and both were married now.
    “We’d get away. I would get us away.”
    “How