Free The Case of the Vampire Cat by John R. Erickson Page A

vampire, seek their gizzards,
    And turn them into squeaking mouses!”
    You might remember that Mary D had shown signs of weirdness earlier in the day. In other words, she knew a thing or two about strange behavior, and she didn’t get it out of a book. She knew about it firsthand.
    And once she had figgered out what I was doing, she played her part like a real pro. She rose slowly from the ground, kind of like a balloon being inflated, and as she rose her eyes grew wider and wider. And remember that she had those greenish-yellow cat eyes, the very spookiest kind when you see them in the dark.
    Her eyes grew wider and wider and you know how cat eyes are sometimes black in the center? That’s the way they were—two glowing circles of greenish-yellow light, with darkness at the centers.
    She floated up to a standing position, and then the middle of her back kept going up, making the kind of hump that cats make when they’re mad or crazy. And she opened her mouth, showed them her spiky little teeth, and cut loose with an eerie yowl.
    Now, sometimes when a cat goes through all of that routine, it will cause a dog to become inflamed and want to start barking. But Mary D was playing her part so well, and it was kind of a dark spooky night anyways and I had softened up the brothers with my vampire story—all of that together took its toll on the morale of the Cannibal Army.
    Their ears shot straight up and their eyes grew as wide as saucers, and I noticed that a strip of hair was beginning to rise on both their backs. And fellers, they were watching every move she made and giving her their full attention.
    In other words, they were not showing signs of inflammation, which was very good, because if they had, we would have been finished. It appeared that we had a chance of pulling it off.

    Well, Mary D went on with the drama. After rising slowly to her feet and humping her back and yowling, she locked her gaze on them and took a step toward them—and hissed. It was a very convincing hiss and it caused the brothers to inch backward. And then she moaned,
    â€œThe moon is full, the earth is turning,
    My vampire appetite is burning.
    Two coyote gizzards I must eat
    To make this dreadful night complete.”
    Say, that DID get their full attention, especially the part about coyote gizzards. Rip looked at Snort and Snort looked at Rip, and then he turned to me.
    â€œUh. Coyote not so hungry now. Maybe Hunk better call off umpire and keep away from Rip and Snort.”
    â€œSure, good idea. I just want you guys to know . . . you’re right, Snort, I’d better try to get her under control—before it’s too late.” I spoke to Kitty. “Get back, vampire, get back! Away, away, be gone!”
    She turned and hissed at me and . . . by George, it sent a few shivers down my backbone, even though I was part of the show.
    â€œHey guys, I’m afraid it’s too late. Once she starts these vampire fits, she’s out of control. All I can tell you is that if she comes after you with those deadly poison vampire fangs, you’d better run for your lives.”
    Right on cue, she sprang in their direction.
    â€œOh no, there she goes! She’s out of control, the vampire has taken over! Run for your lives, boys, and protect your gizzards!”
    There was a mad scramble, and then . . . silence. Total silence. Mary D stood alone in the moonlight. We had pulled it off.
    â€œNice work, Kitty.”
    Her head came around very slowly and . . . hmm, she stared at me with those strange eyes and . . . my goodness, then she hissed, “I AM a vampire and I want YOUR gizzard!”

Chapter Twelve: I Am Turned into a Vampire! (Not Really)

    H UH?
    The old ears shot straight up and the old eyes popped open. I felt the hair rise on the back of my neck as I, uh, went to Full Reverse on all engines and more or less dug four trenches in the snow.
    Then she smiled. “Just kidding. I’ll have