Free Clark, Rachel - Alicia's Awakening (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour) by Rachel Clark

hair from my eyes.
    “Yes, I think so, Sir,” I say in a soft voice. Somehow the moment feels too intimate to use normal voices.
    “Good girl,” he says as he cuddles me close.

    * * * *

    Doug held his trainee sub tight and silently called himself every nasty name under the sun. It was natural for Alicia to associate her orgasm with getting permission from her Dom first. It was why submissives were actually trained.
    But he knew that women who lived a vanilla life sometimes had a difficult time separating the Dom-sub relationship from other meaningful relationships in their history. Alicia wasn’t thinking of him as her Dom. She was seeing him as Doug first and her Dom second.
    It was very likely that this latest panic attack had come from wondering what would happen if he was no longer around. Their contract was for only two weeks. She already associated her orgasms with his permission. But when her training was finished, there would be other Doms. Like he’d done with all the others, he’d train her, teach her everything she needed to know, and then introduce her to the Doms at the club. Most of the subs he’d trained had gone on to find permanent loving Dom-sub relationships.
    He pulled his sub closer, his muscles trembling just a tiny bit, his heartbeat no longer quite as calm as he thought about losing her. Damn .
    Alicia already had a Dom waiting for her. She just didn’t know it yet.
    But it would be a very good idea for him to remember.

Chapter Ten

    I feel safe and content lying here in my Dom’s arms. Even the panic that drilled through me a few minutes ago is just a vague memory. I’m still surprised by my unexpected reaction to what was probably just a random thought, but I can honestly say that I’m no longer embarrassed. That was the closest I’ve come to having a full-blown panic attack since I met Doug, and yet he didn’t turn away. He’s still holding me, grounding me, keeping me safe as I find my equilibrium. I’m actually feeling, for the first time since signing our contract, that I made the right decision to come here. Whatever else happens, I’m already coping better just knowing someone shares my secret.
    And I didn’t need harsh pain this time to stop the panic.
    Doug lifts out of the chair and places me back in my own. He smiles and touches his fingertips to my face before pressing an affectionate kiss to my forehead. “I’ll be back in a moment,” he says gruffly.
    I nod and reach for my water glass. Hell, with all the crying I’ve done since stepping in the door, I’m liable to dehydrate. Doug comes back into the room with a facecloth and clean towel and nods in approval as I drink down the contents of the glass. I reach out my arms to take the towels from him, but he shakes his head, drags his chair closer to mine, and then sits down. I close my eyes as he gently moves the cool washcloth over my face. My eyes feel so raw and itchy I don’t even want to imagine what I must look like.
    Eventually he pats my skin dry.
    “Better?” he asks with a soft smile.
    I nod. “Thank you, Sir.”
    “You’re very welcome, sub.”
    I notice that he changed his shirt while he was out of the room, and can only imagine how much of a mess I made. I am so not a pretty crier.
    He searches my face and for a moment I feel his uncertainty. He’s always so confident, seemingly larger than life, and I forget sometimes that he’s still just a man—no superpowers at all.
    “Are you okay?” I ask, wanting to help him.
    He seems surprised by my question but gives me a quick smile.
    “I’m fine,” he says, “but sometimes even I forget I don’t have all the answers.” He shakes his head as if he can’t quite believe he said that out loud. I want to hug him, assure him he’s not alone. “You look tired.” It’s obvious that he’s changing the subject and I feel a little cheated. I know the premise of a Dom-sub relationship, but there’s no reason why I can’t offer to help a fellow