couldn’t help it, he looked so forlorn, as if he’d said those things instead of Bobby.
His hug enfolded her back, which was both wonderful and heartbreaking. There were a few things she had to say to him as well, and having his arms about her only made it harder. She didn’t want him to release her, and he probably would once she said them.
Listen, I...” she fumbled, “I want you to know, I’d never ask you to give up sports. I know I came across that way, but I really wouldn’t. It’s in your bones, part of who you are—and I love who you are. You have to understand, though, how painful it is to even imagine you destroying your body, concussing that wonderful brain of yours, over and over again for years to come. I’m not sure I can watch that, let alone celebrate it. I know that means I can’t be with you. You—you made that very clear. And I’m all right with that. It hurts, but I get it. I just don’t want you angry at me for not being able to adapt.”
“I’m not angry,” Jarrett tried to assure Liddy. There was such terrible pain in her expression and Jarrett couldn’t bear to think he’d caused it. “That’s who you are, and I love who you are, too. That’s why I came here tonight. To tell you that. And to tell you that I get it, too.”
“Get it?” she echoed.
“Survival of the fittest.” He stroked her arm, her soft, soft arm, stopping on the tattoo and tapping it. “When I first saw this,” he said, “I couldn’t get it out of my mind. It took me a while to figure out why. It looks a little like a football helmet.”
Liddy’s brows went up and she glanced down at her shoulder, re-examining it. “You’re right. It does,” she laughed. “Though, it’s kind of a broken helmet.”
“Skulls are nature’s football helmet,” he observed. “One of my elementary school teachers said that when he was trying to teach us about the human body.” He went somber. Here came the hard part. “You only told me the plain truth about my future. Right to the bone. Which is why I got so mad. See, football is all I’ve ever had. The thought of giving it up scared me. I’ve never even tried to put my mind to anything else...mostly because I was afraid that I’d discover I was stupid and unable to do anything else.”
“What? That’s ridiculous!”
She looked so outraged he hugged her again and almost laughed. God, was this all he’d needed all this time? Someone to believe in his brains as much as they believed in his athletic ability?
“It’s what I used to think,” he went on, “now...I’m starting to value my mind, and I’m not as willing to risk it as I was, not before I know what it can really do. I especially don’t want doctors gluing my skull back together like one of your artifacts. Which is why I’ve decided that I’m not joining the NFL.”
Liddy pushed at her glasses. “You’re not?”
“It might well kill my father when I tell him, but I’ve had more than a few realizations this season. I’m good enough, but not even close to indispensable. And that’s in college ball. Can you imagine how much more replaceable I’d be in the leagues? Which has me wondering if the short career I’m seeing ahead of me would be worth life-long damage to my bones and brains. Putting it in your terms, I think pro football would be a dead end for me.”
“Jet.” She was eyeing him doubtfully. “Are you sure?”
“It wasn’t only what you said,” he assured her. “There’ve been other things. Like having Delarose there to compare myself to, the knee injury and being forced to realize that my dad has directed most of my life and my choices; he raised me to think my athletic talent was all I had going for me. But it isn’t all I’ve got, is it? I think—I think you’re the glue that put all these pieces together so I could see the whole thing and know it.
“Doesn’t mean I’m sorry I went into sports,” he added, “I really do love playing