Free The Funeral Planner by Lynn Isenberg

onto a giant tapestry with overnight delivery guaranteed. I pocket a business card for future reference.
    We find the heart of the organization that’s behind the event. Their association commands a wide booth providing valuable educational information to its twenty-one thousand members, funeral home directors, including the latest information about their lobbying efforts in Washington, D.C., a monthly magazine on current funeral-related topics, public relations tips, programs plus information on everything from mortuary sciences to new compliance laws affecting safe, legal and compassionate operations of funeral homes and ways to help their members enhance quality of service.
    I collect packets of their information, facts and figures gathered by organizations like the U.S. Census Bureau, the Cremation Association of North America and the Casket & Funeral Supply Association of America.
    I turn to Sierra. “Think you’ve got enough visual stimuli here to come up with a great logo?”
    “Oh, I’m buzzing with ideas…for the logo and the Web site.”
    “I can’t wait, but we’ve got to hit the workshops now.”
    “Shall we divide and conquer?” asks Sierra.
    “Good idea.” I open my program and point. “Which one do you want?”
    Sierra reads the options aloud. “‘Business Transformation Trends,’ ‘Strategies for Independent Funeral Homes,’ ‘Civil Celebrants versus Traditional Clergy,’ ‘Everyday Ethics & Etiquette,’ ‘The Pre-Need Market,’ and ‘The Psychology of a Funeral.’ I’ll take ‘Psychology of a Funeral.’”
    “I’ll skip between the ‘Civil Celebrants’ lecture and ‘The Pre-Need Market.’ See you back in the room at eighteen hundred hours.” I smile.
    “Aye, aye.” She gives me a wink.
    I slip in and out of workshops the rest of the afternoon, fascinated to learn about the growing number of “Civil Celebrants,” a fairly new profession in the funeral field catering to clients without religious ties who want to ritualize the death of a loved one by hiring not your everyday clergy, but civil celebrants to conduct the rituals. Civil celebrants can be anyone from your local grocery store clerk to your neighborhood photographer to your personal trainer to your therapist.
    I skip to the next workshop to learn more about the growing discussion on “pre-need” versus “time of need” markets. More funeral homes are using outside vendors to help with more complex funeral arrangements. I’m right on target.
    Back to the room, I decide. I’m laden with brochures and pamphlets. The muscles in my arms have formed into complicated knots. Thoughts of Seth creep into my mind. One thing he excelled at was the soothing of twisted muscles. I miss his touch. I could call, but what for? We were not a good fit.
    I take new action inside the hotel room and luxuriate inside a big bubble-filled hot tub. I leaf through the brochures to digest the information of the day. Sierra enters the room unloading her own accumulated handouts.
    She eyes me enveloped in gyrating bubbles. “Now that looks relaxing,” she says. “Would it be presumptuous of me to join you?”
    “Only if you fail to bring a washcloth.”
    “Done deal,” she replies, plucking a washcloth off the towel rack and tossing it to me. She removes her clothes and slips inside the tub, releasing a sigh of relief. “Ah…the joy of the bath.” She smiles. “So, what exactly is a civil celebrant? Sounds like someone stuck in 1865 on the side of the Union.”
    “You’re ice cold.”
    “Then it sounds like a Miss Manners course on how to celebrate with civility.”
    “Getting warmer.”
    “Well, how about I wash your back while you enlighten me?”
    “You’re on.” I turn and she glides a warm, wet, soapy washcloth across my back.
    “You’ve got great skin. It hasn’t changed at all, so silky and smooth—but these knots!”
    I moan as Sierra kneads one out. “Wow. That feels great.” And I actually relax for a