Free Sweet Sixteen Princess by Meg Cabot

Wednesday, April 28, 9 p.m.,
Albert Einstein High School gymnasium
    â€œSo Lana’s dad rented the sultan of Brunei’s ten-million-dollar yacht for the night, and had Lana and her friends driven out into international waters so they could drink without getting in trouble.”
    This is what Lilly just called to tell me.
    â€œLilly,” I whispered. “You know you aren’t supposed to call me on my cell phone. It is for emergency use only.”
    â€œYou don’t think this is an emergency? Mia, Lana’s dad renting the sultan of Brunei’s yacht like that? That is a throwdown. He is basically telling your grandmother to bring it.”
    â€œI don’t have the slightest idea what you’re talking about.” Because I don’t. “And I have to go. I’m at a PTA meeting, for crying out loud.”
    â€œOh, God.” I can hear the soundtrack for Altar Boyz in the background. Ever since Lilly started going out with J. P. Reynolds-Abernathy the Fourth, she has gotten way into soundtracks from musicals,because J. P.’s dad is a theater producer, and J. P. can get free tickets to any Broadway show he wants, and all of the off-Broadway ones, too. And even the off-off-Broadway ones. “I forgot you had to go to that stupid thing. Sorry I’m not there with you. But…well, you know.”
    I did know. Lilly was serving the last week of a grounding her parents instituted after she was brought home by the NYPD for attacking Andy Milonakis—this kid from downtown whose cable access television show was picked up by MTV—with a Dojo’s side salad. Lilly believes Andy’s getting a basic cable deal instead of her is a travesty of justice, because her own local show, Lilly Tells It Like It Is , is so much better (in her opinion), as it isn’t simply entertaining, but also highlights facts she feels her viewers ought to be aware of. Such as the fact that the U.S.’s decision to withhold $34 million from the United Nations Population Fund will lead to two million unwanted pregnancies, 800,000 induced abortions, 4,700 maternal deaths, and 77,000 infant and child deaths worldwide.
    Whereas a typical episode of Andy’s show features him holding a jar of peanut butter in one hand, a jar of salsa in the other, then making the jars dance with each other.
    Lilly is also peeved that Andy is deceiving the American public by allowing them to think he is just a kid, when we both saw him coming out of d.b.a., which is a bar in the East Village that cards. So how did he get in there if he isn’t at least twenty-one?
    This is what she asked him when she saw him eating a falafel at Dojo’s Health Restaurant on St. Marks Place, and why she claims she was forced to hurl her side salad at him, drenching him in tahini dressing, and causing him to call the cops on her.
    Thankfully the Drs. Moscovitz talked Andy’s legal team out of pressing charges, explaining that Lilly has been experiencing some anger issues since their recent separation.
    But that didn’t stop them from grounding her.
    â€œSo how’s the meeting going?” Lilly asked. “Have they gotten to the you-know-what part yet?”
    â€œI wouldn’t know, because I’m too distracted,talking to YOU,” I whispered. I had to whisper, because I was sitting in a folding chair in the middle of a row of very uptight-looking parents. Being New Yorkers, they were all, of course, very well dressed, with Prada accessories. But being New Yorkers, they were also all angry about the fact that someone was using a cell phone while someone else—namely, Principal Gupta—was up at the podium, speaking. Also, of course, that Principal Gupta was basically saying she couldn’t guarantee that their kids would get into Yale or Harvard, which was making them madder than anything. At $25,000 a year—which is how much tuition at AEHS costs—New York parents expect some return