Free Seer by Robin Roseau

seen them. Are they outside?”
    “They’re shy. They might make an appearance if people settle down.” I took her arm and led the way back to the card table.
    As soon as we arrived, Dean began chanting, “Tira-misu. Tira-misu.” He got about half my guests to join in with him. Dolores and I began laughing, and I held my hands up.
    “You’ll have to ask Dolores,” I said. “She may not wish to share with you guys.”
    “Can Straight Girl cook?” Gabby asked.
    Dolores turned to her, cocking her head. “Don’t think I don’t know what’s going on.”
    “What’s going on?” Gabby asked her.
    “Everyone knows how you turn gay,” Dolores said. “There are germs, and I bet Sidney cooked them into the soup. I saw Sidney pouring something. She said it was curry, but I bet it was dried gay germs.”
    Gabby and Elsa’s eyes both narrowed at her, but Dolores ignored them and went on.
    “But I’m not afraid.”
    “You aren’t, hmm?” Gabby asked, tight lipped.
    “No. I put straight juice into the tiramisu. Are you sure you all want some?”
    The room broke out into stunned silence that lasted about five seconds. Dolores had made a risky joke. American society has such ignorant views of homosexuality, and satire can be dangerous, anyway. But her delivery was perfect, and it all came down to how it was received. If I laughed, acknowledging the joke, it would be seen as me protecting her. And so it hung out there on the air, waiting for a response.
    Dean stepped forward and said, “Sid, I like her!” and then high-fived Dolores. He looked at her. “Honey, there’s not enough straight juice in the country to flip me. Bring out the tiramisu!” He paused. “But don’t let Mike or Sid have any. Those two get along far too well, and I know what would happen if they both went straight. No, I think I better eat Mikes’ share, and Sid’s, too.”
    That generated laughter. Dolores announced, “I’ll get the tiramisu if someone else can get plates.”
    Gabby waited until Dolores disappeared before telling me, “She’s all right, Sidney. For a straight girl.”
    The tiramisu was amazing, and soon there were moans of pleasure from more than one satisfied diner. Dolores received ample thanks and offers to take the leftovers home.
    “What leftovers?” Dean said. Then he turned to Mike. “I’ll be at the gym for the next week, but it’s worth it.”
    For the second round, I moved Dolores and I both to table two. I partnered with Patty and Dolores with Gabby. We split the two games then had time for a third. Dolores and Gabby set Patty and I three hands in a row, and we went out the bottom. I was happy we only counted the first two.
    We had time for four rounds, which was uncommon. But it grew late, and so I declared, “That was the last round.”
    I’d been collecting the score sheets from each round. It took just a minute to total everyone’s individual win-loss record. I did okay, but I was very pleased to see Dolores won the best prize. Elsa had a bad night and would be subjected to the booby prize. I didn’t let anyone see the results until after I passed out the prizes, and so I headed upstairs to my closet of waiting gifts.
    I searched through to see what I wanted. I wasn’t sure what to give Dolores, so I picked one of the generic gifts for her, a restaurant gift card. Then I eyed the booby prizes, digging through the m for a minute before I found the one I wanted.
    Elsa was going to hate it.
    When I got back downstairs, I saw the last of the tiramisu was disappearing. I eyed a plate longingly; I had hoped Dolores would leave a piece or two. She caught me eyeing it and smiled. “There’s already a piece waiting in your fridge for you.”
    “Oh, you’re a darling,” I said. I raised my voice. “All right, with a score of six and two, Dolores is our grand prize winner tonight. Congratulations.” I handed her the envelope.
    “Do I open it?”
    “Yes.”
    She did, looked at it, and then smiled.