Free The Collected Christopher Connery by L. EE

next to Nia in her pretty purple dress.
Speaking of Nia… “Thanks, by the way, for fixing me.”
    “Oh, no, no, no, no!” Snapping her mouth closed before
she could keep running on forever, Nia coughed lightly and folded her hands in
front of her. “I should be thanking you. You were the one who found Connery for
us.”
    “I found – right, the head.” Gail vaguely remembered
yanking a severed head out of a toy box. “So I take it we got him – it –back to
the hotel all right?”
    “Oh yes, we put him in a hat box!”
    Of course, what else? Gail swung her legs over the edge
of the bed, rubbing her still tingling arms.
    “Are you all right, detective?” Nia asked with sudden
urgency. “You don’t feel ill, do you?”
    “No. Should I?”
    “No, no, no, no – I was simply… worried. You were badly
hurt.”
    “Well, you can stop worrying. I’m fine.”
    Nia’s face relaxed into a real smile. “I’m glad.” Then
she jumped a little. “Oh! I was going to ask what you wanted for dinner! Arthur
and I thought you probably wouldn’t want to come down to the restaurant tonight
after all the excitement. Tomorrow, we’ll have to find somewhere nice to eat
–at the Academy’s expense, of course.”
    “Sounds good to me.” Gail plucked at her bloodstained
shirt. “I might take a shower first.”
    “Oh, of course! I should leave you to that, shouldn’t I?
I’m sorry, sometimes I don’t know when to stop talking. I think it’s a common
flaw for people who work alone – talking to oneself, I mean. I work alone a
great deal.”
    Yeah, Gail had gotten that impression.
    “But before I go,” Nia continued brightly, “I do have
some good news.”
    “Wow, really, more?” Then Gail kicked herself for being
an asshole. Without the Illuminator, she probably wouldn’t be here right now.
Best case scenario, she’d be laid up in the hospital. Thanks to Nia’s magic,
she felt almost as good as new except for that tingling and a weird buzzing in
the back of her head. A good night’s sleep would probably cure both. She made
her voice sound friendlier when she added, “What is it?”
    Nia looked at her closely for a moment, seeming unsure if
Gail was making fun of her or not, but apparently decided to give her the
benefit of the doubt. “As it turns out, there is another part of Connery very
close by. Much closer than I would have guessed, actually.”
    That was good news, Gail supposed. The sooner this case
was over and she got the second half of her paycheck, the better. “Where?”
    “Ah, well, I haven’t been able to pinpoint the
location yet. Connery’s magic is so very complex; it will take more precise
work to narrow it down, but you can rest assured that we won’t have to go far!”
    Gail nodded slowly. “Speaking of which, can I ask you
something?”
    “Of course!”
    “The magic in the house. Do you really think Connery had
those spells just lying around for his cronies to steal? I mean, Connery was an
evil bastard, but I don’t think even the evilest of evil bastards would have
murder spells, raising the dead spells, and attack furniture spells all
conveniently on hand at the same time. If nothing else, it seems like just
asking for someone to steal them to use against you.”
    Nia blinked owlishly at her. Then she broke into a bright
smile. “You know, Detective Lin, you’re very astute!”
    “Uh, thanks. It’s sort of my job.”
    The smile faded as quickly as it had come. “I had
actually been pondering the same thing, though I must admit, not with the
exactness you have.”
    “Well, when you spend a lot of time hunting evil
bastards, you start to get an idea of how they think. Most of them wouldn’t
trust their underlings to bring home the right kind of milk, so I have a hard
time believing Connery would leave so much valuable ammunition just lying
around unless he really needed the spells.” She paused. “And does anyone ever
really need a killer furniture spell? Something