Free The General and the Horse-Lord by Sarah Black Page A

peel. Kim had a knack for this.
    He put on an old pair of camo pants, faded and banged up from actual use in a combat zone, black boots, and a black tee shirt. He wasn’t going in looking for trouble, but he wanted trouble to take one look at him and head for the door. Gabriel knocked on his door five minutes later, holding his own glass and wearing camo pants, boots, and a dark brown tee shirt. “Hey.”
    John gestured with his glass. “This is good, isn’t it?”
    “Yeah. Not too sweet. Nice and bitter on the tongue. Kim made these?”
    John nodded. “I wonder if he wants to go to cooking school.”
    Gabriel took a seat on the edge of the bed. “Cecilia seems to think Wainright is just trying to get an okay from somebody up the chain before he gives us any sort of reply. But I don’t think she really knows what’s happening. She just wanted to chat.”
    “You’re a handsome man. I’m sure lots of ladies want a chat.”
    Gabriel sighed, took a sip of his drink, and John stood in front of him, pushed a knee in between his legs on the bed. “Can you come back with me tonight?”
    “Sure.” Gabriel looked a question at him. “If we’re not in jail.”
    John shook his head. “It’s getting pretty damn hard to sleep without you in my bed. All of a sudden, I’m staring at the ceiling in the middle of the night, wondering where you are. Wondering why I can’t sleep.”
    “Yeah, me too. Lot of things changing, I guess.”
    John wondered if he was pushing too hard, or maybe not pushing hard enough? “You just tell me what you want me to do, Gabriel. What you need from me. If you need me to back off and give you some space, just tell me.”
    “It’s not the same with you as with Martha, John. I feel like there’s this lifetime of missed chances to work through. Missed opportunities. I’m not ready to peel you off with this old skin and find a new life. I liked my old life just fine.” He hesitated. “Maybe I wish we could have had something more. I think back all those long years, and all I can remember is yearning and loneliness. Wondering where you were, if you were safe. When I would see you again. Waiting and waiting and waiting some more, hoping for just five minutes of your company.”
    John reached for his hair, slid his fingers into the silky dark. “I wonder why I’ve been feeling so, I don’t know how to describe it, so dissatisfied. So unhappy. I mean, I’m exactly where I wanted to be. Where I planned to be. And this life feels a lot more empty than I expected it to feel. I’ve been thinking about you too. About all those missed chances.” Gabriel looked at him, and John leaned over, tasted the cool drink on his mouth. “I know you’ve got a lot going on. A lot to work through. Don’t let me push you into anything you’re not ready for.”
    Gabriel tugged him back down for another kiss by a handful of his tee shirt. “I’ve been ready for you to push me into something for years.”
    Kim stuck his head in the door, gave a low wolf whistle when he saw them. “What is with you two? You’re making out like teenagers every time you drink tequila.”
    John looked over his shoulder. “Could I suggest you not be so quick to speak when a random thought floats through your empty head?”
    “Okay, fine, fine. I’m just saying. Horse-Lord, did you see my tee shirt?”
    “I did. Please don’t make me look at it again.”
    The split lip had healed, but there was still a little smudge of discoloration under his eye. John wondered if he was going to cover it up with makeup, but Kim just slid some Cherry Berry lip gloss over his mouth and stuck the tube in his pocket. “Ready, Uncles? We’re going to Effex downtown. They’ve got a rooftop bar and a dance floor down below. You’ve love it.”
    A taxi dropped them off on Central, and Kim led the way through a group of rowdy young men and women, already partying on the street. Downtown was glitzy at night, the neon pulsing and the lights