Free Child of All Nations by Pramoedya Ananta Toer

who, through a letter from Miriam, completely dumbfounded me.
    My good Minke, please don’t become bored with us because we’re always nagging you with our opinions about your people and your country. Papa says that right up to today, Minke, the nations of the north have come to your country to tread upon you. Yes, even in our times, Minke. You yourself have experienced this. The north has always been sacred to your people, even in their dreams. Isn’t a dream of sailing northward considered an omen of approaching death? And haven’t your people, since the forgotten ages, buried their corpses pointing to the north? And your ideal home, isn’t that one that faces north? According to Papa, this is because it is from the north that the marching feet of conquering peoples have come, ensuring your backwardness, then deserting you, and leaving you only the waste of their civilization, their diseases, and just a little of their learning.
    I write this with a heavy heart, my dear Minke, not to hurt your feelings, but only to pass on a message: The north contains no magic. But it is true that you must keep your eyes to the north always in vigilance.
    Jean Marais said: “I think, Minke, that your country is too isolated—it can’t bear the life-beat of other countries. They can come out here into warm and gentle lands, relax, live like kings. Even a small nation like the Dutch. And your people can do nothing about it. Three hundred years, Minke. Not an insignificant time.”
    Shameful. And there was more. I felt furious in my impotence.
    This tumult of ideas and opinions from so many people made me more and more confused. School was simpler; you just had to listen and have faith in a few teachers. The best marks went to the student who could turn himself into what the teachers wanted.
    Maarten Nijman wrote: “The Chinese Young Generation, sowell schooled, are jealous of Japan’s achievements, the same Japan that is robbing China of parts of its own territory. They are jealous! And furious and angry because they are aware but powerless.”
    Just like me.
    “Pity the Chinese Young Generation,” said Nijman. “They are forty years behind the Japanese, the cousins of whom they’re so jealous. Imagine, just to rid themselves of their
thau-cang
—pigtails—and to free the feet of their women from that tormenting, deforming custom, will need at least fifteen more years. Even then there is no guarantee of success. Ah yes, because ‘custom’ will oppose the Chinese Young Generation with the force of arms. If they do succeed in ridding the byways of the world of pigtails and the tiny deformed feet of their women, they will still not have freed themselves from that habit of coughing up phlegm and spitting it out—a revolting habit that makes one’s hair stand on end—a habit that has caused the Chinese to lose the sympathy of the whole world! To get rid of that habit the Young Generation would have to work for another twenty-five years at least. So it will still be about seventy-five years before the world won’t feel disgusted when standing near a Chinese.”
    Still Nijman’s opinion: “Japan is now looked upon as equal with Europe, China not yet. What people say is true: There is only one step between China and Japan. But it cannot be measured in miles or kilometers. It is a step in civilization. It can be measured only in terms of the Chinese people’s own capacities.”
    Nijman’s writings were interesting. One day I would ask his opinion of my own people. Are my people as pathetic as the de la Croix family says? Perhaps he has some kind of abacus he can use to calculate how many dozens of years it will take the Javanese to reach the same level as the Japanese.
    And more Nijman: “That distance in civilization, however many steps it may be, is not important. In the end the strong always swallow the weak, even if the strong are only small in number. Just try to imagine: the Chinese nation is a big nation; what if it