Free The Fullness of Quiet by Natasha Orme Page A

office. The doctor asked us to explain what had been going on.
    I watched Daddy as he spoke and picked up some of what he was saying. I signed to him when I thought there were details that he’d missed but mostly I just sat, waiting. When Daddy had finished, the doctor sat thinking. He looked from Daddy to me and then settled his gaze on Helen. I don’t think she really understood what was going on. The reason why we’d brought her to the doctor. To her it was just some bug but to us it was a bit more serious.
    She would have a fever all day and would constantly be sick. She would complain of headaches and feel constantly tired. It seemed too much for a little girl to handle.
    The doctor spoke to Helen for a few minutes and then turned back to Daddy. He explained that he wanted to run a few tests. He wanted a scan, a chest x-ray and some blood samples. Daddy nodded gravely and we left.
    The appointments were scheduled in the space of the next few weeks. Helen continued to go to school but the days she had to go to hospital, we all went with her.
    Finally everything had been sent off for examination and now all we had to do was wait. The atmosphere in the house had been tense for a while. The strain was pushing us dangerously close to the edge. My studies began to slide and I couldn’t keep up with them anymore. I couldn’t focus at all. My homework was rarely finished and I never listened in class. My teacher had made several attempts at speaking to me, encouraging me, asking me to confide in her or at least someone. I couldn’t. She said that if things didn’t improve she would have to bring Daddy in. That was the last thing I wanted. He was already worried enough with Helen, I didn’t want to be an extra burden to him.
    Daddy got a phone call from the hospital about the results. We all went but the doctor asked if me and Helen could wait outside. He said it would be best if he spoke to Daddy on his own first.
    I didn’t like the sound of it but I kept Helen entertained as we waited. We were sat there for about half an hour before the office door opened and the doctor appeared. He asked us to come in. I took Helen’s hand and we walked into the office. Daddy didn’t look too good and I had a bad feeling about it.
    The doctor started talking to Helen and Daddy translated for me. I couldn’t believe what he was telling me. I gripped the arms of my chair until my knuckles turned white. My breathing became shallow and uneven. I looked down at my darling little sister sat next to me. She was so innocent and naive in so many ways.
    Helen had a brain tumor.
    The impact of those words was like a sledgehammer in the stomach. It made me bend over and feel sick. I took some deep breaths and composed myself. Helen would need me be to be emotionally strong now. If I broke down, she would feel like the world was ending around her.
    The doctor explained that he was going to refer us to a specialist and find out whether the tumor was malignant or not but it definitely needed removing. I looked at my poor little sister. The weight of this information didn’t have much of an impact on her, the seriousness of her condition.
    We left the hospital and the day was sunny. I didn’t know how anything could be bright and happy today. I didn’t understand how the world could just be the same, mine certainly wasn’t now. Everything had changed.
    When we finally got to see the specialist, we were still hopeful. It wasn’t much use. The tumor was dangerous. She needed to be in theatre before the end of next week. To think of Helen’s small frail body under the knife made me shiver.
    I practically abandoned my school work in those weeks. There was no point in doing it. My teacher had been informed of what was happening at home and stopped pestering me to do my work. I was a pity case.
    The day of Helen’s operation drew nearer and we were all anxious. Charlie came over to see Helen and she brought some flowers with her. Helen didn’t