Free Cool Campers by Mike Knudson

cracker sandwich and took a huge bite.
    There were a lot of oohs and aahs from the crowd. I thought the girls would be grossed out, but they weren’t. When the boys started chanting Mark’s name, the girls joined right in. Mark took one more bite out of the cracker creation. It was dripping down his chin. Everyone cheered.
    Pretty soon it was time for the girls to go. Diane and Heidi couldn’t stop talking about the Amazing Mark.
    â€œDidn’t you hear how many times he said dude ?” I asked. “I thought you guys hated that.” Heidi and Diane looked at each other.
    â€œI didn’t notice,” Heidi replied.
    Diane shook her head. “Me neither.”
    When we got back to the cabin, everyone was ready for Roses, Thorns, and Buds. It seemed like all of the roses were either the hike up to Grizzly Peak or the Amazing Mark and his disgusting s’more.
    Carl was the last kid to share. He pulled his finger out of his nose and stood up. He cleared his throat and said, “My rose was everything we did today. And my thorn is the word dude . No offense to some of you who are calling everyone dude , but I just can’t take it anymore. It’s driving me nuts.” A couple of other guys nodded their heads, but no one looked directly at us. Then Carl took a deep breath and continued, “And my bud is everything else we’re doing tomorrow.”
    Toad went last. He stood up and said, “My rose is the great hike we went on today. You guys are such an awesome patrol. I guess my thorn is getting you involved in that silly bet with the Muscular Monsters.”
    â€œIt’s okay, dude. I mean, Toad,” Graham said. Then he mouthed “Sorry” to Carl.
    â€œNo, I should have been a better example to you guys. But that brings me to my bud: seeing Flex and the Muscular Monsters wearing their underpants on their heads Friday night!”
    We all jumped up and cheered. “Har! Toad Claws!” we yelled, hopping in circles. After last night’s adventure and today’s hike, we decided to call it an early night.
    Just before Graham and I stood up, Toad came over and sat down by us.
    â€œHey, guys. I just want you to know I’ve really enjoyed having you in my patrol. I don’t know where all this dude stuff came from, but let me give you some advice.” Graham and I leaned in toward him.
    â€œJust be yourselves, and don’t try to be like anyone else. We’ve got a great patrol, and you’ve made a lot of friends here who like you for who you are. That’s what camp is all about. Remember that.” Then he got up and walked down toward the lodge.
    I looked at Graham. “What’s that supposed to mean? How can the Amazing Mark get away with calling everyone dude , and when we do it, all of a sudden people think we’re not being ourselves?”
    â€œI know,” Graham said. “It’s like everyone’s saying that Mark can say dude because he’s cool. But us, no way—we’re geeks and should only say geeky things. I can’t believe Carl complained about us. I wish I could say my thorn over again. I’d say it was seeing Carl pick his nose all the time.”
    â€œOh well, I guess we should stop saying dude . Heidi and Diane thought it was weird too.”
    Graham lowered his eyebrows and looked me square in the eyes. “No way,” he said. “No one’s going to tell me what it means to be myself. Maybe being myself is saying dude . Or maybe I’ll want to eat a mixture of gross stuff tomorrow at lunch. Actually, that’s exactly what I’ll do tomorrow.”
    â€œNot me. I think I’d puke.” I shivered just imagining it. “I guess maybe I’m fine with not being cool.”
    â€œCome on, hermano ,” Graham said. “We don’t have to spend our lives being geeks. If we want to be the Amazing Raymond and Graham, then what’s stopping us?