Free Mutiny! by Jim Ladd

Chapter One
CASTAWAY AHOY!

     
    S amson Starbuck peered at the bowl of food in front of him and wrinkled his nose. Breakfast on board pirate spaceship the
Jolly Apollo
was never good, but today’s looked
awful
. The bowl contained a thick grey liquid halfway between porridge
and
soup, which seemed to be both watery and lumpy at the same time. It smelled of old fish and engine oil.
    As Sam stared at the bowl he was sure that something in it moved. Feeling sick, he pushed the bowl away and sat up. All around him in the mess hall, his fellow crew mates were digging into the disgusting gloop hungrily.
    “How can you eat that?” Sam asked Piole, the pirate sitting next to him. “It’s revolting!”
    Piole turned to look at Sam, food dribbling from three of his twelve mouths.
    “The food here is
always
revolting,” Piole replied. “But it’s the only food we get so you may as well make the most of it. Aren’t you eating yours?”
    “No, do you want it?” Sam knew the answeralready – Piole would eat just about anything.
    “Cheers, me hearty!” said Piole, swapping Sam’s bowl for his own empty one.
    Sam felt the slap of a large tentacle on his shoulder and turned to see Barney, the ship’s cook, standing behind him. Although Barney looked fearsome – he was a gigantic, multi-tentacled Kraken – he was actually Sam’s best friend.
    “Morning, Sam,” said Barney. “Finished already? You must be growing – here, have some more!”
    He slopped out another ladleful of the disgusting gloop into the empty bowl before wandering off, whistling a merry space shanty to himself. Sam groaned and leaned his head on the table.
    “Growing?” Romero, the huge lobster-clawed snippernaut, guffawed. “Sam could grow for a Traxonion year and he’d still be a space sprat!”
    “Hey!” Sam protested as the other pirates laughed.
    “Aye, aye, shipmate,” said Captain Comet to Sam, plonking himself down on the bench.
    Comet was one of the most extravagantly dressed space pirates in the Universe. He liked bright frock coats and always wore a tricorn hat. He had eye patches covering two of his three eyes and a long waxed moustache that stuck out from each side of his face like curled wire.
    Comet might look like a perfect pirate, but Sam knew he and his crew were widely regarded as the most useless space pirates in all the known galaxies – and probably the unknown galaxies as well. However, beneath all the bluster, bragging, incompetence and cowardice, Captain Comet had a heart of gold and truly cared for his crew.
    Which was just as well, because Sam had joined the
Jolly Apollo
to try and rescue his parents, who had been space-shipwrecked on the mysterious Planet X. The pirates were only too happy to help. The planet was rumoured to be made of solid gold. And Sam had a map of how to get there!
    “What’s wrong, are you space-sick?” asked Captain Comet.
    Sam shook his head.
    “So what is it, me hearty? It can’t be that bad!”
    Sam picked up his bowl. The grey sludge shuddered and a bubble popped at the surface, releasing a smell like the inside of an old bowling shoe.
    “Oh,” said Comet. “It
is
that bad.” He grimaced and pushed the bowl towards Piole, who gave the captain a cheery wink.

    “Anyhow,” Comet continued, “I thought you’d like a quick status update – we’re making good progress. We’ve passed the Corkscrew Galaxy and I think we should reach this wormhole soon.” He pointed to the scrap of spacesuit material on which Sam’s mother had drawn the map.
    Sam raised his head and looked at it excitedly. They were getting closer by the minute! And they had managed not to get lost for three days now – a
Jolly Apollo
record.
    “Castaway ahoy! Castaway ahoy!”
    The shout from the crow’s nest was loud and clear, even down in the mess hall.
    “A-ha, sounds like we’ve spotted someone,” said Comet. “Some poor hapless soul, cast adrift on a barren rock with their meagre possessions.