Free Darkest Day (StrikeForce #3) by Colleen Vanderlinden Page A

one. Ryan had been forced to wear it, too, but his had been a threat, a warning not to piss Alpha off or his powers would be dampened. Mine was a reality. He’d sent me out to fight, dampened.
    Because he was just that kind of asshole.
    “Well, that will totally be up to you,” I said. “If that’s what you want, we can do that. But you still need to learn how to handle your powers in case it ever has to come off for some reason.”
    “That makes sense,” she said, just as Ryan climbed into the plane.
    “You’ll be happy to know that they were totally depressed to not be dealing with you today,” he said to me.
    “Yeah, I’m sure they were heartbroken,” I answered, and he chuckled. We took off, and I pressed my comm.
    “We’re bringing her in. She’s collared. Super hearing and fire starter powers,” I said.
    A moment later, Portia answered. “We’ll have a room ready for her. Nice job out there, Daystar. The media is loving the way you talked her down. Lots of positive feedback.”
    “Well, I’m feeling a little off my game today,” I said.
    “I figured it wouldn’t last,” she said wryly. “Bring her to my office when you’re back.”
    “Will do,” I said, and then I released the button on my comm and settled back in my seat. While part of me, the part that seemed to always be looking for a fight, kind of wished this had been a tougher call, I was mostly relieved that she hadn’t pushed me. I was grateful that she hadn’t given me any reason to lose it. Mama wasn’t far from my thoughts, and it was a blessing and a curse. On one hand, remembering her and trying to be who she thought I was helped keep me keep a bit of restraint and not just lose it completely. On the other hand, of course, remembering her and knowing that she’d been cheated out of the rest of what should have been a long, happy life, just made me either want to scream or cry. I swallowed and tried to stop thinking. That is so much easier said than done, though.
    When we arrived back at Command, we walked Vivian up to Portia’s office, dropped her off, then went back out. This time, Ryan flew the jet, and I took to the skies by myself. It was better than being in the jet, and I knew Ryan knew something was up and he would either not talk, trying to put me at ease, or he’d ask me what was wrong and I’d end up blubbering or something. This was better. Flying usually cleared my head. It didn’t do that this time, but I tried to focus on my job, on the feel of cold air seeping through my body armor, the sight of the city stretched out far below. All too soon, we came to the end of our patrol shift, and when we got back to Command, I was less than thrilled at the prospect of the free time I had ahead of me, just me and my thoughts and a room empty other than me and my many, many regrets.
     
     
     
    I landed on the flight deck moments after Ryan landed the mini jet. I talked for a moment with one of the flight crew members as Ryan climbed down out of the cockpit, then I started to leave. I glanced toward Ryan and the flight crew members as I did, trying to catch his eye so I could give him a quick wave or something, but he was already watching me. He held a finger up, gesturing for me to wait a second as he finished talked to the mechanics. I stopped near the exit to the flight bay, and after a few more words, he jogged over to me, held open the door to the corridor beyond, and then we headed toward the elevator.
    Once we were on the elevator, he looked down at me. “Okay. Now that that’s over with for today I can finally talk to you.”
    “About what?” I asked him.
    “You seem completely down in the dumps today. Last night, too, when we weren’t busy with the mission. So. Is there anything you want to talk about or is there anything I can do?”
    I met his eyes. Warm, golden brown eyes. I shook my head. Debated whether I wanted to talk about it or not. And then, because somehow Ryan has managed to work his way past