sobbed. I rubbed his back as I silently cursed his family to the lowest pits of Hell and beyond. My heart was breaking for poor, sweet Sam.
A disgusted snort from my right caused my attention to fly to Gideon, and I saw the stony expression on his face as he bit out, “Teagan’s right Sam. I’m sorry but your family is full of assholes!” Gideon’s jaw was clenched so tightly, I started to worry that he might accidently crack a tooth, or at the very least cause himself a migraine.
Sniffling, Sam choked out, “I know. It wasn’t until that moment that I realized that my family was like a bunch of strangers to me. I questioned to myself whether or not any of them really loved me or cared about me at all. I never had any problems with Simon before, but at that moment in time I can honestly say that I did hate him. I couldn’t believe how selfish he was being. He turned the situation around and made it sound like he was the injured party. I was laying there on the hospital bed, wounded and in pain listening as my brother and my parents started arguing about what needed to change. I was the victim and yet I was the one being blamed for everything. I felt cold and dead inside…like nobody loved me or understood me. I hated my life, and I hated myself.”
Sam’s voice sounded small and broken, and I had to wipe away another tear that snuck down my cheek. God, I was so tired of crying. I don’t even think I cried this much the night I caught Kyle and Eva in bed together. Honestly, I was on the verge of begging Sergeant Ramsey to let Sam stop talking about his story if he didn’t want to continue. I truthfully didn’t know if any of us could handle hearing any more of his story. It just kept getting worse and worse. Looking around the circle, I concluded that everyone who was presently in the Common Room was an emotional wreck. I sincerely regretted thrusting Sam in the spotlight when it was obvious his pain was still too fresh. I could only hope that his story was finally drawing to a close.
“I remember what happened now.” His gaze went around the room as he steadily looked each one of us in the eye. “Forcing me to talk about my family has brought back my memory of my last day and what I did to myself. I remember that later on in the week I was finally released from the hospital. The day after my release, I was lying in bed in my room and noticed how quiet it was in the house. I realized that everyone was out, so I snuck downstairs to the kitchen to grab a knife. The trip downstairs was very slow-going because it hurt to move, and it hurt to breathe. I was sweaty and feeling nauseous from the pain by the time I finally made it inside the kitchen. Even though I was hurting, I was still careful to choose the brand new knife that my mom had recently bought. I made my way back upstairs and locked myself in the bathroom. I remember sitting in the bathtub in my pajamas as I slit my wrists. I was in so much pain from my other injuries that I hardly felt the slice of the knife. I don’t remember anything else after that.” Shrugging his shoulders at us, he ended, “That’s it. That’s the end of Samuel.”
There was a moment of silence as each of us reflected on Sam’s story. Even though horrible things had happened to him, I sincerely hoped that he felt better talking about his past. Everyone needed closure. Catching his eye, I announced, “Good riddance to your family and your past life! That chapter of your life is over now and a new one is about to begin. There’s no doubt that you’ve hit rock bottom, but I hope you can take comfort in knowing that from here on out things can only improve and get better for you.” I had a habit of being sickeningly optimistic at times, but I rarely said things that I didn’t mean, and I could feel in the very depths of my heart that Sam, Gideon, and I were all in a much better place now. I turned my head and chuckled ruefully as Jamie and Dr. Duffy both simultaneously
Owen R. O'Neill, Jordan Leah Hunter