Free Absence of Faith by Anthony S. Policastro Page A

many are deeply concerned about
it."
    "You sure know a lot about it. Did
this happen to you?"
    Chantress hesitated.
    "Yes, it did."
    Are you one of the leaders?" Kyle
asked.
    "No, never. I've always been
interested in psychology. I got involved as a way to rebel against
my parents. They are Catholics and sent me to Catholic school - the
whole bit. I just couldn't buy the Catholic religion - too
unnatural for me. I believe the Church misinterpreted Christ's
teachings to benefit their own ends with all this suffering they
propose everyone should do to gain entrance into heaven. It just
seems unnatural to me. I think God intended us to be happy,
fruitful and fulfilled in what we do in our lives. I don't believe
God intended for us to suffer, put ourselves down and be humble. So
I joined the Satanists hoping to find those things," Chantress
explained.
    "Did you?"
    "Yes and no. Satanism is the exact
opposite of the Roman Catholic Church. Its ceremonies mimic the
Catholic Mass only in reverse. It was great at first. I had found a
group that put down the Catholic Church and its teachings and they
maintained that you should do what you believed to make yourself
happy. Do what you believe is good for yourself with little regard
for rules and regulations...and others," she said. "The lure of
Satanism is that there is no wrong. It's very powerful. We can have
whatever pleasure we desire. Do whatever we want."
    "That would cause total chaos,"
Kyle said.
    "Yes and no. They didn't say break
any laws; just do your own thing. Focus your energies on doing what
you wanted," she added.
    "So what happened? You sound like
it didn't work for you?"
    "It didn't. I realized that
Satanism is just another religion and its leaders use it as a means
to gain power over other people...a power trip for the leaders. I
also don't like Satanism’s disregard for others. Do what you want;
what makes your happy even if it hurts others."
    "So you quit?"
    "No. I organized a few members -
ones that thought like I did - into this New Age group I was
telling you about, but it's not working," she said.
    "Why not? Just quit, hold your
meetings somewhere else and forget about the devil worshippers,"
Kyle added.
    "It's not that easy. Many have a
bond with the Magus and if they leave misfortune will strike," she
explained.
    "Magus?"
    "He's the leader, the high priest.
The bond is like a curse, and many won't leave for fear of personal
tragedy, even bodily harm."
    "What a bunch of bull!" Kyle said.
"He has that kind of power over them?"
    "Without a doubt," she
said.
    "Does he have this over
you?"
    "No, because I'm not as high in
rank as the others," Chantress said.
    "Well then just have one of your
meetings and invite everybody," Kyle suggested.
    "No one would come. They're too
scared, but if I brought you to one of the Black Masses, they would
see that I was gaining support. Would you come?" Chantress
asked.
    "Yeah, why not. Are you sure I
would be allowed?"
    "Sure. They're having a Black Mass
this Sunday at the Magus' house. I'll set it up," she told
him.
    The two remained silent until the
waiter dressed in black approached their table and asked if they
needed anything. Chantress ordered a cinnamon herb tea, and Kyle
ordered another beer.
    "DWI you know and I'm driving
tonight," Chantress said. "I did all the talking, now it's your
turn. Do you work? Go to school?" Chantress asked.
    "I'm a bartender at The Drunken
Pelican three nights a week," Kyle replied. "I tried some courses
at the county college, but I just couldn’t get into it."
    "Oh," Chantress said.
    "Tell me more about the Black
Mass," Kyle explained.
    "I'm not supposed to...you'll have
to see it for yourself if they allow you to come," she
said.
    "Allow me to come?"
    "You have to be approved by the
Magus. I have to bring you to his house in the afternoon and he
decides," she said.
    "I have to be approved? What kind
of crap is that? Either you want to be a member or not.
Approved!"
    "There are reasons."
    "What?