Free Wayward Hearts by Susan Anne Mason

her way out.
    The fresh air brought welcome relief to her labored lungs. She breathed in, willing them to feel normal again.
    Jason headed straight to the truck but instead of following him, Maxi found herself drawn to the burned-out barn. She walked across the field, mesmerized by the site of destruction. Had someone really caused this or had it been an accident? She hugged her arms to her torso. Even though the day was mild, a chill crept over her.
    As she turned, her gaze landed on the stump of the old elm tree. The only remaining evidence of the disaster that had occurred eight years ago. Maxi lurched forward and placed her hand on the trunk.
    Drew, I miss you so much.
    She fell to her knees, her forehead resting against the rough bark. Against her will, unbearable memories of that horrible night rose again to plague her. Memories of how she’d hurled up the driveway in her father’s old truck, so furious at Jason, and at herself for stooping so low as to spy on him, that at first she hadn’t noticed the red glow coming from Drew’s tree house. When it finally penetrated, she’d hit the brakes and screeched to a halt, gravel spewing from the tires. She barely remembered leaving the truck, running to the base of the elm tree, and shrieking Drew’s name. Though aware on some level the fire was too far gone, she whirled to get the hose from the barn. In a panic, she pulled and tugged as far as she could possibly stretch it, but it was no use.
    A movement above her had riveted her attention upward in time to see the body of her brother, engulfed in flames, stagger to the edge of the tree house. The sheer horror of the vision paralyzed Maxi, rooting her feet to the ground like the tree before her. A primal scream escaped as Drew teetered on the edge for what seemed like minutes and then dropped. The hideous thud of his body hitting the ground had jolted her into action. She raced toward him, ripping off her denim jacket as she ran. As soon as she reached him, she beat the flames from his body, but to no avail.
    Drew was already dead.
    She wasn’t sure how long she’d sat clutching his lifeless form to her chest, oblivious to the heat and smoke, and the lifelessness of her brother before Jason found her. He pried Drew away, and with infinite gentleness, covered his blistered face with a blanket. Her precious brother with the sandy blond hair and goofy grin was gone. Forever.
    “Oh, God. I can’t relive this again.”
    The sound of her own voice startled her, bringing her back to the present, to the feel of the cool grass beneath her face. She’d curled into a fetal position, rocking back and forth as she had on that horrifying night. Sobs tore through her, along with a tornado of emotions, the toxic mixture combining to choke the breath out of her.
    Her body suddenly seemed weightless, floating off the ground. Had God come to exact his punishment at long last? Maybe retribution wouldn’t be so bad after all, if it meant she’d be free of the torturing guilt.
    “You’re all right. I’m here with you.”
    Jason.
    Soft fabric brushed Maxi’s cheek. A steady heartbeat thumped under her ear. Warm breath moved in her hair. She clutched onto Jason as though he was the only thing keeping her from floating up to the heavens with Drew.
    “It wasn’t your fault. You hear me. It was an accident.” Jason’s fierce whisper penetrated her stupor as he released her to stand on her own two feet.
    Still, she couldn’t seem to stem the torrent of tears that besieged her. Eventually the cocooning warmth of Jason’s body seeped into her, and the shaking subsided.
    She lifted her head, the breeze chilling her wet face. “We both know it was my fault. I’d give anything to bring him back. To take his place.”
    “So would I.” His voice was gruff with emotion.
    She clung to him, allowing his hands to soothe the tension from her back muscles. Jason was the one person who understood what that night had done to her, the havoc