Free Dust to Dust: A Broken Fairy Tale by S. P. Cervantes

thought of being in the middle of it all is something that gets his fire burning. I can’t help but think a part of him also wants to be there to make sure I’m safe. He has been fiercely protective of me since that horrible night on the 4 th of July, so I can’t say I’d be surprised.
    Holden spent most of the summer down at the shore with me and the girls, only leaving to go to the city to do business. It is nice to be back together again. I’ve always felt a sense of peace around him, growing up. Being with him is always just easy; nothing is ever forced. Holden and I have gotten to a place of friendship that I never thought would have been possible again. Yes, I think he’s hot. And yes, there is an attraction there. But being friends feels better than anything else can for me right now. The comfort of knowing he will always be my friend is far more attractive to me right now than the comfort his touch would bring me.
    One thing that worries me at times is that Holden has not been spending as much time with Bridgette as he did when he first returned. Bridgette’s visits were less frequent as the summer drew on, and are now virtually nonexistent. I keep telling Holden he needs to go back into the city, especially during the week, but he always just laughs it off and simply says he is where he wants to be. Having Holden and Jess at my side these past three months has helped me to realize that I’m really not alone in all of this, and that if Marcus really does decide to leave me, they will be here for me. That is incredibly comforting to me.
    I know what you’re thinking and you’re wrong. While I have been trying desperately to hold my marriage together and woo Marcus back, Holden has been nothing but a friend to me. He never acts like anything but the friend I know and love since we were kids. He knows keeping me busy is the best thing to keep me from dwelling on the demise of my relationship with Marcus and seems to make it his life’s mission to fill my days and nights. When I’m down to the shore, we always go on morning runs together, and have coffee most nights under the stars, chatting about work and the girls…about life. And while Holden is always still his usual sexy self with smoldering eyes, I want nothing more than to have him as my friend again and either does he. Now, of course, I always make sure my teeth are brushed and am sure to put make-up on every morning before leaving the security of my bedroom, knowing Holden could show up on the deck at any moment. But that has nothing to do with romantic feelings for him. I also may have bought a new wardrobe of running clothes, thinking that my shabby college T-shirts and boxers weren’t the most flattering. There was nothing wrong with hoping he will at least find me as attractive as I find him. It is purely platonic, though, and that is the way I want it. Innocent flirting is what we are best at anyway. I know we are both happy to be back together again, and I don’t want to do anything to ruin that. Anything romantic between us will definitely do that.
    Marcus is still carrying on an affair and hasn’t made any moves to stop the divorce proceedings, but he’s begun spending more time with the girls again when we moved back into the city once school began. Marcus moved out of our apartment and into a hotel, although I have my suspicions he spends most of his time with the slut he is cheating on me with. As time has gone on, I’ve realized Marcus has no plans of taking me back and I need to move on, and start letting go. I am getting used to the idea of a girl-only household, and am even starting to enjoy it. But while things are getting easier for me, my greatest fear is that Sophie and Ellie will be hurt in all of this. I’ve seen what divorce can do to kids, but so far, they’ve stayed the same happy-go-lucky girls they’ve always been. Marcus and I are both in agreement that however we feel about each other, we will never share those