Free A Daughter's Secret by Anne Bennett
Authors: Anne Bennett
leave, then it was best to go as soon as she could. To delay at all would open a can of worms that would be much better left sealed.
Aggie tried to lift her spirits for the rest of that day for the sake of her parents, but she knew she wasn’t very successful. Each passing moment meant she was one step nearer to leaving this house and her family for ever. She was glad to seek the solitude of her bedroom away from the watchful and concerned eyes of her father.
She didn’t feel the slightest bit tired. Sitting down on the bed, she wished she could have embraced her father that night as she had Finn, until the child had complained that she was holding him too tight. She didn’t try it with Joe, or Tom either, for that would have certainly brought comment, and while Tom might have understood, Joe certainly would have been horrified at her girlish sloppiness. For her parents too there had been just the usual peck on the cheek, but she knew her disappearance would be a grievous blow for her father, for he had a soft spot for her.
She would always miss them, not just her father but her mother too, though she could be sharp and unfair at times; the darling baby, Nuala; cheekywee Finn, and Joe, who was always telling them the exotic places he would visit when he was a grown man; and her favourite and special brother, Tom.
Everything was familiar: the cottage where she had been born and reared, where the hens pecked at the grit in the cobbled yard before the door. She would even miss the indolent, smelly pig in the sty beside the house, too fat to move easily and too lazy to care. Farmland stretched on every side, some fields filled with cows, with their big eyes and swollen udders as they placidly chewed the cud, while others were cultivated, and the hillsides were dotted with sheep.
She had looked on the farm so many times without really appreciating the beauty of it as she did now. She knew that she was doing the only thing she could do to save her family’s disgrace, but it was hard and she was bloody scared stiff.
She got up and took a turn around the room, which suddenly seemed very dear to her, and she touched each item in turn until she came to the crib. Then she looked down at her little sister’s podgy hands either side of her head in the total abandonment of sleep and traced her finger gently around one until the baby gave a sigh and her hand closed in a fist. Aggie leaned over the crib and gently kissed Nuala’s little pink cheek as the tears began. She tried to stifle them, but Tom, lying awake too, heard. He wished he could go in, but knew Aggie would probably be embarrassed.
Eventually, awash with tears, she threw herself on the bed and closed her eyes.
She awoke stiff and shivering with cold, and saw with horror the clock said the time was half-past two. She roused herself quickly and began to gather the things that she was taking with her. She decided to travel in her clothes for Mass as they were the smartest she had: woollen plaid dress, black stockings and button boots, a proper coat and matching bonnet. She had taken her mother’s large bag that she took when she went into Buncrana on Saturday, because she didn’t have anything else, and into it she put underwear and nightwear, her two everyday dresses and cardigan and her warmest thickest shawl.
She had one last look around the room and then eased the window up gently and climbed through it. But, as quiet as she tried to be, Tom heard as he was lying wide-eyed on the bed, worry for his sister driving sleep from him, though he was aching with tiredness. He pulled the curtain aside and saw her walk by the window. Hurriedly he dressed and followed her.
Aggie was glad when Tom fell into step beside her. She hadn’t expected it when he had to be up at five for the milking anyway, but she valued his company. They didn’t talk much. They had said all that needed to be said, but Aggie thought for her brother to be there walking by her side was
Aggie tried to lift her spirits for the rest of that day for the sake of her parents, but she knew she wasn’t very successful. Each passing moment meant she was one step nearer to leaving this house and her family for ever. She was glad to seek the solitude of her bedroom away from the watchful and concerned eyes of her father.
She didn’t feel the slightest bit tired. Sitting down on the bed, she wished she could have embraced her father that night as she had Finn, until the child had complained that she was holding him too tight. She didn’t try it with Joe, or Tom either, for that would have certainly brought comment, and while Tom might have understood, Joe certainly would have been horrified at her girlish sloppiness. For her parents too there had been just the usual peck on the cheek, but she knew her disappearance would be a grievous blow for her father, for he had a soft spot for her.
She would always miss them, not just her father but her mother too, though she could be sharp and unfair at times; the darling baby, Nuala; cheekywee Finn, and Joe, who was always telling them the exotic places he would visit when he was a grown man; and her favourite and special brother, Tom.
Everything was familiar: the cottage where she had been born and reared, where the hens pecked at the grit in the cobbled yard before the door. She would even miss the indolent, smelly pig in the sty beside the house, too fat to move easily and too lazy to care. Farmland stretched on every side, some fields filled with cows, with their big eyes and swollen udders as they placidly chewed the cud, while others were cultivated, and the hillsides were dotted with sheep.
She had looked on the farm so many times without really appreciating the beauty of it as she did now. She knew that she was doing the only thing she could do to save her family’s disgrace, but it was hard and she was bloody scared stiff.
She got up and took a turn around the room, which suddenly seemed very dear to her, and she touched each item in turn until she came to the crib. Then she looked down at her little sister’s podgy hands either side of her head in the total abandonment of sleep and traced her finger gently around one until the baby gave a sigh and her hand closed in a fist. Aggie leaned over the crib and gently kissed Nuala’s little pink cheek as the tears began. She tried to stifle them, but Tom, lying awake too, heard. He wished he could go in, but knew Aggie would probably be embarrassed.
Eventually, awash with tears, she threw herself on the bed and closed her eyes.
She awoke stiff and shivering with cold, and saw with horror the clock said the time was half-past two. She roused herself quickly and began to gather the things that she was taking with her. She decided to travel in her clothes for Mass as they were the smartest she had: woollen plaid dress, black stockings and button boots, a proper coat and matching bonnet. She had taken her mother’s large bag that she took when she went into Buncrana on Saturday, because she didn’t have anything else, and into it she put underwear and nightwear, her two everyday dresses and cardigan and her warmest thickest shawl.
She had one last look around the room and then eased the window up gently and climbed through it. But, as quiet as she tried to be, Tom heard as he was lying wide-eyed on the bed, worry for his sister driving sleep from him, though he was aching with tiredness. He pulled the curtain aside and saw her walk by the window. Hurriedly he dressed and followed her.
Aggie was glad when Tom fell into step beside her. She hadn’t expected it when he had to be up at five for the milking anyway, but she valued his company. They didn’t talk much. They had said all that needed to be said, but Aggie thought for her brother to be there walking by her side was