Free Upstate by Kalisha Buckhanon

staring at it a little too hard and I didn’t want him to be up there jacking off and thinking about you. So I put it under my pillow and I was looking at it every night before I went to bed, but I had to stop that because then I was wanting to beat my own meat after looking at it, and I ain’t trying to go out like that. So now I look at it first thing in the morning so your pretty brown eyes can wish me a nice day.
    So Laneice and Black done hooked up? I’m not surprised. He told me he thought she was fine. Member when we all went down to Times Square on that Friday night, the first night me and you had kissed after you slapped me for grabbing your ass? Well, I had told Black then that I wanted to talk to you and he said he wanted to talk to you too. I told him hell no, you was mine. He had to take Laneice. He said Laneice was too mean, and he was right.
That bitch is mean, always snapping her fingers and fighting and balling with the boys and getting mad over each and every point. But he thought she was cute. He called her chocolate and liked her dimples and dark lipstick. But then when he tried to hold her hand, she snatched it away and told him to keep his motherfuckin hands off her. So it was a wrap. But I guess they finally found a common ground. I hope it work out for them a little better than it seem to be working out for us, though I’m still glad I didn’t let him talk to you that night.
    On another note, I finally got to take a shit in my own toilet. I got the cell all to myself. Benito and Mohammed was in the hole. Mohammed was just bugging out in our cell right after mess hall. Benito got mad cause on his bed Mohammed had left one of his headwraps or kente cloths or whatever that shit he got permission to wear on his head cause of his religion. So he went loco on Mohammed, talking about how he was sick and tired of Mohammed acting like he own the world and he know it all and shit. Then Mohammed said, I should be the one mad cause I gotta put this on my head and it’s gone swimming in your cum. Then Benito decked him and Mohammed decked him back and before you know it everybody on the block was screaming and shouting and clanging shit up against the bars and the guards was running as fast as they could to get up here. Mohammed was telling Benito he was gonna fuck him up and Benito was saying the same, and I thought they really was gonna kill each other. Mohammed had Benito in a
headlock, and Benito had started to breathe real funny and hard cause he couldn’t catch his breath. Then he had elbowed Mohammed in the jaw, and I heard Mohammed neck snap back and he got real dizzy and fell. Then Benito had Mohammed head in the toilet. I didn’t know what to do Natasha. All of the shouting and banging and shit, all of the sweat and noise and chaos in the room. This funny horn started going off, and then these bright white lights started flickering real fast like when you at the club. I got dizzy myself and I just got scared that all these people was gonna swarm in our cell and think I was fighting and then try to attack me too. So I covered my head and tried to crawl under my bed in the corner. I just crawled under there and I was shaking and crying and trying to cover my ears and shut my eyes and disappear. I saw the guards feet when they came in, and I heard the little sticks they carry thudding up against Benito and Mohammed. I heard one of them say, Where’s the other one? Then hands was pulling my feet from under the bed. I thought they was gonna carry me away too, but they didn’t. They just kind of grabbed me by the back of my neck and threw me on the bed and told me to get out of the way, which is what I was tryin to do before they pulled me from under the bed. Then they just took Benito and Mohammed away, while everybody on the block was spitting and yelling and cussing out the guards. I saw our door slide back and I heard that click to let me know I was locked in, then I