Free Boy Kills Man by Matt Whyman Page B

just leave. I loved him as a brother, but now I saw him in a new light. I needed space to take it in. Finally, he moved towards the door, only to stall and reach for his back pocket. ‘I was thinking, Sonny maybe you should look after my match ticket, like you did with the piece.’ He glanced at my uncle, making sure he remained out of earshot. ‘Way I see things, it’s one less thing to worry about.’

9
    The emergency room at San Vicente de Paul Hospital is a crazy place. People from every
barrio
went there, including their gang members. Looking for a space when we arrived, I half expected a war to break out at any moment. I couldn’t work out what was stopping them from killing each other, but for the need to get patched up. Then I figured maybe Jairo was right. Sometimes it was best just to keep your head down and not ask questions.
    Luckily, my uncle was seen quickly, mostly because his breathing had got so tight, and with no questions asked about how his foot had been nicked by a bullet.
    â€˜Nicked?’ he said, sounding like he’d lost once again. ‘It’s still a
gunshot!
’
    Once he had been checked out, we were told to sit in the waiting area and a nurse would call him to dress the wound. Uncle Jairo was still in an almighty mood as I helped him to a bench at the back, but at least time passed quick enough. There was just such a lot going on: all that noise and blood and emotion, so much life and so much death.
    My uncle barely had a good word for anyone, except the intern who came over with painkillers. Most of the time he sat there muttering to himself, though his whispers broke up one time and he started sobbing again. It was a bit embarrassing as a lot of people started looking at us, but mostly I felt for Jairo. The way he breathed in pitiful snatches made me think this went down deeper than the shooting, and I tried to comfort him. I put my arm around his shoulders, and that brought him to his senses.
    â€˜Don’t be a faggot!’ He shrugged me away smartly, and scrubbed his cheeks with his shirt-sleeve. ‘Haven’t you disappointed me enough already, Sonny?’
    I felt bad about what had happened, but at least my bones stopped aching after Jairo offered me the extra pill he’d been given in case the pain got any worse. He may have been mad at me, but I guess in the end he also felt responsible for different reasons. The effects were strong, but I didn’t complain. It also made it easier for us both to sit together against that hard wall and watch people come and go. We saw a lot of victims in the hour or so we were there, from what could’ve been muggings and road accidents, stabbings, fist-fights and some bullet wounds more serious than ours. Some walked in, many arrived on stretchers wearing masks and tubes and all sorts.
    When a nurse finally called for my uncle I expected him to snap at her for being made to wait so long. Instead, he accepted her apology without complaint, as if being here had opened his eyes to a few things. I stood up to go with him, but he insisted that I stay behind. The nurse invited him to ease into a wheelchair, and he even nodded at me as she wheeled him backwards through the crowds. I figured old Jairo was relieved to be in good hands. I just wished I could have said the same thing for myself.
    All alone, in this hot and crowded space, I went back to fretting that the peace simply could not last. I tried hard not to think about it, but there were just too many faces dotted around who looked like they might be packing. It was as if my life no longer had a safety catch, thanks to Alberto, and now I saw danger everywhere. That he had even got his hands on a gun was a big deal for me. To see him pull the trigger was something else. My life had gone on hold when that bullet whistled past my ear, and when it started again things were different.
Everything
had changed. For me, that gun stopped being something to