Free Around the Way Girls 9 by Ms. Michel Moore

scamming the system, getting childcare checks for a babysitter I’d never even met, wherever I went Shannon had to tag along too. Wasn’t no need letting someone else collect almost $800 a month to ignore her; I was doing just fine with that part on my own. Walking through the cold streets, I pulled my hoodie closer together, wishing the zipper at least worked. It was a cold day for the end of September but I wasn’t about to waste not a single dime on bus or cab fare. I had a habit to feed so every dollar was on reserve for just that. I only lived a few miles up Linwood from where we were so as long as Shannon didn’t whine about her little legs being tired I was straight. I was a veteran of walking this strip; day in and out it was no thang!
    â€œMommy, can Daddy pick us up?” Shannon called from ten paces behind me.
    â€œHave you ever seen his punk ass pick me up? Hell, he barely lets you in that fancy car of his.” I rolled my eyes hollering at her over my shoulder.
    â€œWell can we sit down then?” Her existence was starting to irritate the hell out of me. Why couldn’t Jimmy’s ass come get her more? Had I known I’d be stuck on twenty-four-seven, I would’ve taken a triple payout on top of the abortion money. It was too fucking late now.
    â€œIf you sit your ass down, you’ll be getting left. Now I don’t want to hear another word out of your good-for-nothing ass for the rest of the day! Keep up!”
    â€œBut, Mommy, my flip-flop broke and I’m hungry.”
    Turning around, running back to her, I slapped the right side of her face with fury. “Didn’t you just hear me tell you to shut the fuck up? Don’t let me tell you again.”
    Sniffling, trying not to cry, Shannon already knew I wasn’t soft to tears. Matter of fact I wasn’t a nurturing-type parent at all. Shannon could learn the hard way if she chose to. Whatever I said was the golden rule so the only way to survive in my household was to abide by all of them. Picking the dollar store flip-flop off of the cement, seeing it ripped in half, I shook my head, annoyed in the worst way. “Oh well, guess you gonna have to watch your step. I keep tellin’ ya little young ass to take care of your things. I’m not about to keep spending the little pennies I get from your daddy on shoes and shit!” Shoving the flip-flop in her hand, I turned to start back on my stroll. “Bring ya ass!”
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    2001: James
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    â€œI’ll be going to get that filthy child of yours this weekend, Jimmy,” my mother reminded me. She’d been playing the middleman picking Shannon up from Shawntay for years so I wouldn’t have to be bothered. I couldn’t wait for that child to turn eighteen, getting out of my pocket for good. My son was all I needed in this life to be secure. “I know I said you shouldn’t have anything to do with her, but seeing how poorly kempt that whore has been keeping her even saddens my cold heart.”
    I’d never heard my mother speak gently of Shannon. She was always too dark, too chunky, or her teeth were spaced apart too far. It had been a rough five years of me being able to balance my marriage with Beth while keeping Shannon at bay with one eight-hour visitation a week. It might’ve sounded pathetic but that’s all she was worth.
    â€œIs it that bad? Shawntay gets the one hundred dollars a week faithfully.”
    â€œMy assumption is that she spends it on alcohol and drugs, ’cause that child reeks of both when she comes over here. She leaves a ring around my bath! And in my old age, I’m getting tired of driving all the way across town into the ghetto. You’re just like how your father was: a trash prowler. I hope you teach that junior of yours something different.” No matter what day of the week or when the conversation took place, Sally always found a way to tear my father’s legacy