supposed to feed animals human food anyways.”
“I called Campbell this morning while you were sleeping and filled her in on how you were okay and with me. Told her we would be back Sunday and everyone needed to give you a little space until then. And no, you aren’t supposed to feed animals human food. But Hendrix isn’t like other dogs; he’s a part-human part-elephant, gorilla dog with super strength. He can have something special every now and then.”
“Yeah, well, you’re going to give him a heart attack,” she adds, taking another bite of her food. “So, Campbell was okay with your little plan?”
“She seemed to be. The other women in the background, not so much. There was a lot of shouting and demands to see you, but Campbell smoothed it out.”
“Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me about Vivian and Carly. They were probably already packed and in the car. I’ll be sure to call or text them.”
“I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re camped out at your apartment when you get back to Denver on Sunday night,” I laugh. I can only imagine what Campbell had to do or say to calm those women down, but I knew it was a bag full of drama Jen didn’t need right now. The air needed to settle before the mother hens were allowed to hover.
“Well, they care about me, even if it can be a little smothering. We’re each other’s family. I wouldn’t trade them for the world. Besides, did I hear you say Sunday night? What in the hell do you need help with that we can’t take care of this morning and be back by tonight?” Jen places her mug and plate on the ground and settles in for an argument. I stuff the remainder of my breakfast in my mouth and stand to gather the dishes, ignoring her confrontational posture. “I have things I need to get back to, and I have no clothes. I can’t exactly wear your nasty sweats for the next day and a half,” she huffs.
She watches as I pick up her dishes and move toward the camper. “It’s taken care of, Jen. I went to Walmart this morning and picked you up some things,” I say over my shoulder and then whistle for Henri to follow me.
“What?” she shouts.
I hear her stumbling out of her chair in an attempt to chase after me, and Henri immediately begins to bark at her. I struggle to maintain a straight face, picturing the scene unfolding behind my back. When I look back, she’s picking herself off the ground and attempting to hold onto the sweats which are falling off her while at the same time ward off Henri who is trying to lick her.
“Do I look like the type of girl who has ever stepped foot in a Walmart? Do they even have clothes?” she asks, as she bats Henri away and finds her footing to stand up.
“Hendrix, come here,” I command. He whimpers, but reluctantly leaves her side and goes inside the camper. “No, princess, you certainly don’t look like someone who would ever step foot in a Walmart. Maybe you should spend a little more time learning how the other half lives so the fall off your high horse wouldn’t hurt so badly.”
I immediately turn and enter the camper, closing the door behind me. I know I’m provoking her a tad, but I figure feisty Jen needs to return. If I take the white gloves off and treat her like I always do, maybe her fire will ignite once again. My guess is spot on when I hear the camper door slam as I’m placing the dishes in the sink.
“What in the hell is that supposed to mean?” she shouts. “I’m a completely down to Earth person. Dammit, I go through my closet every year and send things to Goodwill for fuck’s sake. Just because I don’t like to prance my ass around Wally World so I can have my picture taken and put on those stupid people of Walmart Facebook collages which everyone laughs at doesn’t make me a snob. Excuse me for not wanting to be featured on Tosh.0.”
With that, I burst into laughter. Hendrix is caught off guard and begins to howl. I’m glad Jen’s found her spunk, even if it’s to tell
Patria L. Dunn (Patria Dunn-Rowe)
Glynnis Campbell, Sarah McKerrigan