Free Murder of a Barbie and Ken by Denise Swanson

“So, I said to him, ‘Johnny, I’ll shave my pubic hair in a heart shape for you the day you twist your weenie into a poodle dog shape for me.’”
    Simon groaned, and Skye suppressed a giggle.
    Kathy scribbled furiously, then flipped back through her notes, and frowned. “You seem to have known more famous people than Forrest Gump. How old did you say you were, Bunny?”
    Bunny winked. “Let’s just leave it at somewhere between thirty and a Wal-Mart greeter.”
    Kathy appeared to mull over Bunny’s answer, then got up and smoothed her beautifully tailored red wool suit. “Regardless, you’ve had quite a life.”
    Bunny walked the newspaperwoman to the foyer. “Well, Kathy, I always say that every woman should have a past juicy enough to look forward to retelling in her old age.”
    Skye watched as Bunny waved her new friend out the door, then said to Simon, “Now what do we do?”
    The bell immediately rang and Bunny flung open the door. This time it was Skye’s turn to grow pale.
    Her mother, May, pushed past Bunny, and marched straight to Skye. “What in the name of heaven is going on around here?”
    May had not been happy with Skye’s explanation of the day’s events, and had taken an instant dislike to Bunny.
    Now, Bunny and Simon sat in chairs opposite May and Skye. Skye examined both mothers. May was fifty-seven, and Skye guessed Bunny to be about the same age—more from references to her experiences than from her appearance. Both were about five-two, but May had an athletic build that reminded Skye of the cheerleader her mother once had been, while Bunny looked more like an aging
Playboy
centerfold. May’s short salt-and-pepper hair took less than five minutes to style each morning. Skye didn’t even want to think about Bunny’s long red curls.
    But the biggest difference was the eyes. May’s emerald eyes shone with a sense of well-being, even when she was bawling out Skye for keeping secrets, while Bunny’s hazel eyes had a haunted look that never quite went away, even when she was laughing. Maybe Skye should point that out to Simon. Or maybe she should mind her own business.
    May whispered into Skye’s ear, “Her fake eyelashes are longer than her skirt.”
    “Mother,” Skye warned.
    Bunny settled back in the recliner and smiled at May. “Charlie told me so much about you.”
    “That’s funny, because he didn’t mention you at all.” May bared her teeth in what was supposed to pass for a smile.
    “That naughty boy.”
    “Yes, Charlie has certainly been a naughty boy.” May turned to Skye. “Tell me again about finding the Addisons’ bodies.”
    Bunny tsked. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me about that as soon as you got home. When that newspaper lady told me about it, I just about swooned.”
    “What newspaperwoman?” May asked Skye.
    Skye explained about Kathryn Steele.
    May fumed. “Let me get this straight. You and your fatherfind two dead bodies, Simon’s mother moves in with you, it’s all going to be in the
Star
, and you didn’t think to call me?”
    Skye hedged. “I figured Dad would fill you in about the bodies, and I thought Simon should be the first to know about Bunny, and the newspaper thing just happened a minute before you arrived.”
    “I see.”
    “Besides, I thought for sure Uncle Charlie would have let you know.” Skye sneezed and searched her pocket for a tissue.
    “God bless you.” May reached into her purse and handed Skye a Kleenex. “Don’t worry, Charlie’s on my list, too. Along with your father.”
    Skye didn’t need to ask what list May was referring to, because she already knew it was the one she frequently occupied. Instead she asked, “What did Dad do?”
    “He came home, got his gear, and went hunting with the dog. Didn’t mention one word about finding the Addisons.” May crossed her arms.
    “How did you hear about it?”
    “I stopped at the police station to get my check—I forgot to take it last time I was at