Free Selby Snaps by Duncan Ball

back and lay there spitting out mud and gasping for breath.
    ‘Okay, okay,’ he said. ‘You got to the other side. That’s the important thing. Now let’s go home.’
    Twenty minutes later Karen saw Equity and Selby walking down the street.
    ‘Equity!’ she cried. ‘You’re back! Oh, goodness! Look at your feet — they’re all muddy. Kevin! Bring a wet towel, quickly!’ Then Karen noticed the mud-covered Selby. ‘You did this, didn’t you?!’ she said. ‘You led her away!’
    ‘Give me a break,’ Selby thought. ‘I saved her life. So this is what I get for trying to help.’ ‘Hey, you, shoo!’ Kevin cried. ‘You’re filthy!’ Selby was about to go home. ‘He’s right,’ he thought. ‘I am a bit muddy.’ With this Selby shook himself, covering Kevin and Karen from head to foot in mud.
    ‘You disgusting dog!’ Karen screamed. ‘Get out of here!’
    Selby smiled to himself as he pranced across the street. He knew that the mud that was leftin his fur would soon dry and he’d be himself again.

Act VI: The Final Curtain
    A week later Dr and Mrs Trifle and Selby watched as the removalists filled the van with Karen and Kevin’s furniture.
    ‘I don’t think they liked it here,’ Mrs Trifle said.
    ‘Yes, I suspect that the simple life was just a bit too simple for them,’ Dr Trifle said.
    Equity stopped as she was about to get into the car and looked over at Selby. And Selby looked at Equity. Then suddenly she wagged her tail. She got into the car and looked at him through the window.
    ‘She finally noticed me!’ Selby thought. ‘And now she’s going. This is a tragedy! This is a catastrophe!’
    Selby watched Equity and Equity watched Selby as the car made its way down the street and finally disappeared around the corner.
    ‘Hang, on, what am I saying? It’s all very sad but, let’s face it, it had to end. She’s a lovely dog but she just isn’t the dog for a talking, thinking, feeling dog like me.’
    Paw note: Which just means that I fell in love (yes, again!).
    S
    Paw note: To see how I learned to talk, read the first story in the book
Selby’s Secret.
    S

SELBY SLAMMED
    ‘See you later, Selby,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘We’re off to a play rehearsal for the afternoon so you’ll be here all by yourself. I hope that’s okay.’
    ‘Sometimes I think that you think Selby understands what you’re saying,’ Dr Trifle said. ‘You talk to him like he’s a person.’
    ‘Maybe he
does
understand me,’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Pets know more than you think.’
    ‘Well in that case,’ Dr Trifle said, patting Selby, ‘we’ll be rehearsing with the Bogusville Stage–Stompers. We hope you have a delightful afternoon. Wish us luck because we haven’t learned our lines properly yet.’
    ‘Now who’s being silly?’ Mrs Trifle said. ‘Stop making fun of me and let’s go.’
    ‘Another whole afternoon to myself!’ Selby thought as they drove away and he turned on the TV. ‘And today there’s a Wrestling SuperStars Marathon! Oh boy, oh boy, hours and hours of wrestling!’
    Selby quickly settled down to watch all his favourite wrestlers — Canvas-Back Calhoon, Alice ‘The Alligator’ Plimpton, and Bird-Brain Betty — who always whistled like a canary when she climbed into the ring.
    ‘This is great!’ Selby squealed as a referee was thrown into the audience.
    Then Cannonball Calliber was shot into the ring from a cannon. And Leatherlungs Lazaro sang an opera song while Skullface Scott threw him around like a doll. As soon as he finished singing he suddenly got angry and fought back and won.
    ‘The whole thing is silly and they’re just pretending to fight,’ Selby thought, ‘but it’s soooo much fun to watch!’
    Two hours later Selby was giggling away as Canvas-Back Calhoon’s mother jumped intothe ring and started hitting the referee on the head with her umbrella.
    Then, suddenly, he felt a breeze.
    ‘Sister! My pipes have burst! Our house has completely