Free Casserine by Bernard Lee DeLeo

turned the wheel, flipping the rover onto its top. He reached in past her, and turned it off.
    “I have been gone for three minutes, Tonto, three minutes inside the quarters. You said you would like a cup of tea, so I naturally volunteered to get the tea for us. I come back out and you’re upside down in the only moving vehicle we have.”
    “Your point being?” Adrian rasped as the seat harness dug into her a little more.
    “I should have said touch everything on the control panel while I’m inside doing your bidding, but no, stupid me, I say don’t touch anything Adrian until we go through the manuals.”
    “It was an accident, Jake, I.”
    “Don’t you even go there,” Jake said, pointing his finger at Adrian’s reddening face through the window. “I swear I will leave you right like you are for the next two hours.”
    “You’d do that to the future mother of your children?” She asked indignantly. “You brute.”
    Jake braced himself under her as he hit the release on her seat harness. Her weight staggered him, but he eased her down and out of the open hatch. Jake went to one knee and rolled her off his shoulder into a sitting position, handing her the tea he had brought out. He sat down on the ground next to her and sipped from the cup he had brought out for himself. “Well, here’s another fine mess you’ve gotten us into, Stanley.”
    The tea shot out of Adrian’s mouth and nose as she heard the line from an old black and white movie disc of some comedy characters, named Laurel and Hardy. Jake’s friend Dougherty had brought them when the
    Tennyson had arrived with the land rover. They had watched it after he left, laughing uproariously at the simple gaffs the two of them made. Adrian choked for the next couple of minutes as Jake laughed and patted her back.
    “I…I’m go. going to get you for this, Ollie,” Adrian spluttered, wiping her face with a cloth Jake handed her. “You did that on purpose.”
    “Your point being?”
    “Get me another cup of tea.”
    “You didn’t say the magic word, Gracie.”
    “The next magic words I utter will be don’t forget your helmet on your way to the cave.”
    “I will get your tea right away, mistress. Will you be drinking this cup, Miss, or cleaning out your nasal passages with it?” Jake ducked the slap at the back of his head, and used the momentum to get started for the living quarters. He stopped momentarily as he looked around.
    “What?” Adrian asked.
    “I was looking for something to tie you up with until I can getback.”
    “Very funny, shall I call ahead and make your reservations at the cave, Mr. Funnyman?”
    “I’m going. At least I don’t have to tell you to not touch anything. You’ve eliminated that option,” Jake informed her as he walked away.
    Jake spent the next hour and a half rigging up a series of pulleys to ease the rover back right side up. Using the rocks around them for support, he took up tension on one side as he let off on the other until the rover eased back onto its treads. He looked it over for any obvious damage while Adrian comically folded her arms over her chest, and tapped her foot as if late for an appointment. He looked up at her sideways.
    “Well?” She asked impatiently.
    “Well what?” Jake replied.
    “Are we going for a ride or not?”
    “We could have been on a twenty kilometer excursion if I would have ignored your demand for a cup of tea.”
    “Fine, now, are we going for a ride, or shall I get you your walking stick and helmet, Mr. ‘I Will Keep Ragging Adrian Until I Get Sent To The Cave’. I’m driving too.”
    Jake stood up and headed inside the quarters.
    “Jake, where are you going now?”
    He looked back over his shoulder. “To get my helmet.”
    “I’ll take off without you, and get lost,” Adrian warned.
    “I figure you’ll be good for about fifty yards, and then you’ll be upside down again. Even you can find your way back from there,” Jake replied on his way