Free Hold Me Close (Devil's Chariots Motorcycle Club Book 1) by Miranda Banks Page B

to him for support and he’d gone and fallen for her. If he followed his gut and tried, would she be happy or resent him for it?
     
    He knew. He'd seen it in her eyes. But did she feel the same today? Was she just experiencing lust because she'd been without so long? Or did she feel it? The love that he felt. The chemistry that he thought they had.
     
    He was pissed at himself. He wanted to leave, but now he was debating taking this all the way. What the fuck?
     
    ***
     
    She felt so guilty noticing the muscles bulging beneath his t-shirt. She felt even worse wondering what they’d feel like beneath her hands. The thought sent a small shiver through her body.
     
    The ache was deep. The need for him was strong. But she wasn’t going to act on it. She couldn’t. He was Johnny. He was Dan’s best friend. He was a man that came to her broken and healed her along with himself. He wasn’t someone that came to her wanting more. But god damn he was sexy.
     
    She bet Liza agreed. She'd gotten to touch him. She'd gotten to hold him. Feel him. Whore.
     
    “Grab your beer. I have to pee and then I’ll make myself a drink and join you.” She hopped upstairs quickly and slightly more excited than she should have been.
     
    The mirror said more than her words ever could. There was a smile on her face. There was a sparkle of mischief in her eyes. Most of all, there was a look of longing on her face.
     
    She adjusted her skirt and blouse and combed through her hair before she headed back down. She may not find the strength she needed to actually follow through, but she certainly was going to look her best as she floundered around in his company.
     
    ***
     
    The beer was going to his head. He’d had a few so far. Normally he wouldn’t be affected by it, but that night Johnny was certain it was making his brain a little fuzzy.
     
    When he looked at her, it seemed even fuzzier. He wanted her. Desperately. But not just for the night. He wanted her for life. What the hell kind of thought was that? His best friend was barely gone and he was planning a life with his old lady.
     
    Bethany had been drinking some sort of mixed drink. He’d bet that she was a coke and rum or vodka kind of gal. She seemed the type. Funny—he realized he’d never asked her. He’d had beer with her a few times, but she’d always opted for water. Tonight, she was on drink three or four and still going strong.
     
    He could have sworn she slid closer to him when she sat back down. That she was looking at him differently. That she was touching his arm more often. But it had to be the beer. She couldn’t possibly be having the same damned thoughts he was. Could she?
     
    He wanted her in ways he shouldn't. He wanted her in ways no one would be okay with. But he couldn't help it.
     
    ***
     
    If he noticed her effort he certainly didn’t show it. He seemed calm, cool, and collected even as she brushed her fingers along his arm “by accident.” This scared her. Was he that naïve or was he that uninterested?
     
    The heat inside her had deepened and she wasn’t sure how to solve it. She wanted him. To hell with funerals and everyone else’s opinion. She needed to feel his hands and mouth on her. To be comforted in a way she’d never prepared herself for.
     
    Every now and then she thought she saw the same feeling flicker in his eyes. But those moments were short lived. Then he'd go back to generic conversation.
     
    Maybe that's why he'd chosen Liza. Because it wasn't her. Maybe he just didn't find her attractive.
     
    Without asking him to fuck her, she couldn’t imagine what else she could do to let him know she was interested.
     
    ***
     
    “I can see why Dan loved you the way he did.” The words popped out as Johnny sat and watched her smile.
     
    She was beautiful. She needed to know that. Even if it made the situation awkward. Which it didn’t seem to do. She just smiled at him further and thanked him.
     
    Bethany was different.