Free Within Sight (New Adult Biker Gang Romance) (Night Horses MC Book 5) by Sarah Sorana

I knew that I had to figure out what to do next – to think, to plan, to rise above this misery.
     
    All I could think about was the diary I’d hidden in the attic when I was ten.
     
    There was no way that they could have given me that, was there? No way that I could get that memory back, that moment back?
     
    I’d been so proud of her hiding spot, too.
     
    I’d been so happy.
     
    I knew that I had to pull myself together, but I wasn’t quite sure how.
     
    Without a word, the men loaded up the car.
     
    “Come on,” Merle said, finally.
     
    I was still standing there, still numb, still staring ahead at the house in which I’d grown up.
    I thought that I saw a flicker of movement, a curtain swaying, perhaps.
     
    Were they there?
     
    Were my parents inside, watching me, refusing to come out and even have the – the – the fucking balls to answer to the pain on my face?
     
    Were they?
     
    I had to know.
     
    Merle reached for me, but I moved too quickly, I startled all of them with my explosion of rage.
     
    I startled myself.
     
    Before I’d realized I’d made the decision to act, I’d crossed the lawn. You could see my footprints in the grass. It was supposed to be perfect.
     
    Fuck that.
     
    The door was heavy wood, and I knew that it was hard to hear knocks on it in parts of the house. I alternated, pounding desperately on the door and pressing the bell over and over, hearing the ringing chimes disrupt the smooth perfection of the orderly lives within.
     
    Fuck them, fuck them, FUCK THEM.
     
    “Megan, hush,” Merle said, coming up behind me and putting a hand on my shoulder.
    I hadn’t realized I’d been yelling.
     
    Shit.
     
    What must I look like?
     
    They were afraid I was some sort of drugged-up floozy, some out-of-control teen who needed a stern lesson in consequences.
     
    The thought that that was exactly how I looked took the wind out of my sails.
     
    I sagged.
     
    I let Merle steer me back towards the car.
     
    I sat down, I buckled the seatbelt.
     
    I didn’t speak.
     
    Finally, the men stopped trying. They stopped trying to convince me to talk, or join in.
     
    The car fell silent.
     
    It wasn’t natural, I knew. These men would normally be talking to one another, chatting, playing loud music and letting off steam.
     
    I’d ruined that. Everything I touched was breaking.
     
    I couldn’t even really bring myself to care.
     
    I missed my house.
     
    I missed my dog.
     
    Merle helped me get set up in a studio apartment.
     
    I asked him how much a month it was and he waved it off.
     
    “Don’t worry about it until you graduate,” he said. “I’ll run some money through that needs to get clean, it’ll show up that you paid. It’ll build up your credit score and everything.”
     
    “Who cares about my credit score?” I asked with a laugh.
     
    “Oh, you should,” Merle said. “Most of us can’t get a loan, how can we run a business?”
     
    “Why do you care about running a business?” I asked him.
     
    “Breaking the law is one thing, but, damn, you don’t want to fuck with the IRS,” he said.
     
    I looked for a hint of a joke in his eyes.
     
    “You’re really serious,” I said.
     
    “Hell yes,” he said. “Half the drug runners are behind bars because of tax evasion, not selling dope. I’ve gotta be careful.”
     
    “That’s not… My father is an accountant,” I said.
     
    “Man, I have a great accountant,” Merle said. “Bastard gets a tidy sum with no risk. I should have been an accountant.”
     
    After a few more minutes, he left me alone in the apartment, alone with the echoes of our conversation.
     
    I had never been alone like that, never spent a night without someone else.
     
    My parents. My friends. Merle.
     
    They were all gone.
     
    I was alone, truly alone, for the first time in my life.
     
    I curled up on the bed and pulled the blankets over my head and cried. As I cried, I cursed Merle, I cursed my parents, I